


Oblivion : Epiphany

by 8bit_person



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Awkward Hinata is best Hinata, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Hinata Shouyou & Yamaguchi Tadashi Friendship, Hinata Shouyou is a Dork, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Bad At Titles, M/M, Please don't read if you're sensitive, Protective Kageyama Tobio, Teen Romance, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Tsukishima Kei is a Dork, Tsukishma Kei is NOT bad with feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-10
Updated: 2018-06-30
Packaged: 2019-05-04 22:21:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 26,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14602950
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/8bit_person/pseuds/8bit_person
Summary: “Are you rejecting me?” Tsukishima asked calmly. Hinata froze.“Well... not exactly – "“So you want to date me?” Tsukishima interrupted, causing Hinata’s blood to rush to his face.“No! But,” Hinata looked away, “I don’t wanna date someone who's not serious with me. They have to at least... prove themselves or something...” Hinata pouted and fiddled with the end of his scarf.Tsukishima paused. One second, two seconds, three seconds... Tsukishima couldn’t hold himself back, he sneered at what Hinata said before declaring, “So you want me to court you? If that’s what you want, then okay. I’ll woo you in an old-fashioned manner.”Hinata grumbled then made a small sound of stubbornness that sounded like “hmph”. Still shocked but slowly coming to terms with the sudden confession, Hinata glared at the blond with flushed cheeks then pointed at him before exclaiming, “G-g-go on! I won’t lose to you!”With that said, Tsukishima smirked at the ginger. Oblivion. He knew that Hinata was still in that oblivious state so he just ignored the spouted nonsense from the shorter male and enjoyed the show he’d soon participate in. The blond just hoped that things would end in his favor.





	1. Oblivion

For a very long time, Tsukishima hated a certain ginger’s smile.

Something irked him and it was something that Tsukishima couldn’t exactly explain. He couldn’t describe the uneasiness he felt when that person stared at him and grinned with the usual carefree attitude. The gaze from the ginger’s warm, brown eyes that seemed to be harmless before suddenly became sharp and uncomfortable. The words of praises that went out of his mouth made Tsukishima tense. The wild, orange hair that irritated Tsukishima seemed surprisingly endearing and honestly, the short stature of the ginger, the pouts, the expression of adoration, and even the sudden burst of unexplainable noises that Tsukishima didn’t understand all looked appealing to the blond but if there was one thing that topped the previously stated reasons on why the ginger was appealing, it was the smile.

How irritating it was.

Tsukishima wanted none of it but when he didn’t get one, he would secretly and exasperatedly hope for some. The blond hated it. He desperately tried to avoid feeling it.

But just like a gust of wind that blew on a dry, summer day, the ginger suddenly popped up today and flashed a beam towards him. True to the description, the shorter male’s smile was a summertime breeze, an unexpected yet relieving surprise combined with the scorching heat. Similar to how he stared at the sun, Tsukishima narrowed his eyes and glared at the ginger, wishing for the short male to leave immediately.

He didn’t though. So what did Tsukishima do? Obviously, he riled the hell out of the ginger.

“What? Did you fail another quiz again?” Tsukishima quipped.

“No! I just wanna... well...” Hinata looked away, rubbing the back of his neck coyly. The blond raised an eyebrow and folded his arms impatiently. Hinata noticed this so he gulped before he took a deep breath and stood up straight.

“Winter is coming!” Hinata exclaimed.

Tsukishima gawked at what the shorter male said. He mused about the possibility of it being a reference to a meme but the blond pushed it away when he recalled that Hinata didn’t have a clear concept of what a meme actually was. He browsed various reasons on why Hinata shouted that and weighed each one of the explanations that popped up on his mind. To no avail, Tsukishima sighed in the end and said, “And? Do you want to play volleyball on Christmas too? Are you inviting others?”

Hinata blinked before he tilted his head to the left because of confusion. Tsukishima found the reaction adorable but not like he would say it out loud.

“Well, it isn’t impossible for you to think of an idea like that. You’re a simpleton idiot who only thinks about volley –“

“No!” Hinata interrupted. “I won’t ask for any of my friends to be with me on Christmas day!”

After that was silence. Neither one talked. Hinata fidgeted and fiddled with the hems of his shirt. Tsukishima gaped at him before rubbing his temples out of exhaustion. Practice just finished and the blond wanted nothing but to go home and rest. Was that too much to ask? Why did he had to encounter a situation where he didn’t know what the hell a certain ginger that he may or may not like was saying? Tsukishima wanted none of that crap so he did something out of character.

He grabbed Hinata’s scarf with both of his hands and pulled him close. Hinata gasped at the sudden close proximity but he froze when he realized that he was close to someone he never expected to be close to. Tsukishima was inches away from him and Hinata didn’t like the unexpected action from the tall blond.

“Uh... Tsukishima... what?” Out of nervousness, those are the only words Hinata muttered. Tsukishima sneered at the stupid reaction. He observed the shorter male and caught on with what he was doing. Slightly embarrassed by his senseless action, Tsukishima decided to wrap the scarf around Hinata’s head to which the ginger yelped in irritation.

“What the – Dang it, Tsukishima! You jerk!” Hinata’s muffled scream were heard as he tried to stop the blond from tying the scarf around his head. Tsukishima successfully knotted the red muffler around the ginger’s head – eyes, to be exact. He huffed and took a step back, watching Hinata attempt to remove the scarf while whining about how much of a bully the blond was. Tsukishima smirked in satisfaction. He escaped a situation he wasn’t ready to face yet.

“You better untie this! I can’t go home if my scarf covers my eyes!” Hinata blurted out as he stomped. He grunted in frustration.

“Can’t go home because you can’t see, huh? Do you want my help, shrimp?” Tsukishima mocked. “Do you want me to hold your hand for you just so you can go home?”

Hinata went quiet and turned to the direction where he assumed the blond was. He was spot-on since Tsukishima was staring at him with stun.

Reaching his hand out, Hinata blurted out, “Where’s your hand? Let me hold it so you can lead me home.”

Tsukishima gazed at the hand that was certainly smaller than his. He eyed Hinata before he apprehensively held it. He glanced at the ginger but halted when he saw the soft smile he had. At this point of his life, the blond was sure that he was whipped for the ginger for some unknown reason. How and why he ended up liking the shorter male was something out of the blond male’s reach but he didn’t mind. Gripping the smaller hand and pulling it close, Tsukishima walked ahead with Hinata behind him. The two men walked in silence.

Practice finished, they were done cleaning the gym, and all that was left was to go home. Since this and that happened, they unpredictably went home together.

As they went out of the school’s gate hand in hand, Hinata was able to walk beside the taller man. He couldn’t see anything and he could forcibly yank the muffler away from his eyes but he didn’t do it. There was something he needed to ask so he kept up the act and let the blond lead him home.

As cold as the winter breeze was, the atmosphere between them was oddly warm. Tsukishima certainly didn’t like it. He would rather get it over with. If he was interested with someone, he could say it immediately. He would lose nothing. It wasn’t like he would die if he did say it to Hinata. Finally making his mind up, Tsukishima halted, a small bump behind him that signaled that Hinata stopped as well and was confused by the abrupt halt.

“What? Why did you stop walking?” Hinata questioned. Tsukishima tightened his grip on the ginger’s hand, making Hinata feel even more puzzled.

“Listen carefully because I won’t repeat this again.” Tsukishima said.

Snow started falling. Cliché, Tsukishima thought. He sneered and took a deep inhale before letting go of Hinata’s hand and untying the scarf that prevented Hinata from seeing. And there it was again, the brown eyes that made the blond awkward and tense. Taking a step back, he gazed at Hinata with seriousness that made the ginger anxious as well.

“Expect the unexpected.” Tsukishima muttered out of nowhere. Hinata furrowed his eyebrows before saying, “What do you –“

“Go out with me.”

Hinata blinked and took a few seconds to process the words confessed to him. After a complete three seconds, Hinata gasped and jumped away from the taller male. He pointed at Tsukishima with a red face. Tsukishima wanted to say something condescending but he was not in a situation where he could do as he please. He needed answers so he refrained himself from saying anything biting.

“You... like me? As in you, Tsukishima Kei, likes me, Hinata Shouyo?” asked Hinata.

“Yes. Tsukishima Kei likes Hinata Shouyo. What about it? Can’t I like someone, even if that someone is an idiot who only cares about volleyball?” Tsukishima retorted, unable to hold his condescending remarks back.

“Wah! This is weird! Not only do you like someone, that someone is me!” Hinata yelled as he let his hands brush his unruly hair making it look more disorderly. Tsukishima sighed and seriously wondered if he should visit a therapist. Tsukishima liking someone was already weird but him liking Hinata was on the list of situations that even Yamaguchi wouldn’t think of happening. Now that Tsukishima thought of Yamaguchi, he pondered about how he should explain it to his childhood friend.

“Quit it out and give an answer.” Tsukishima snapped, disdainfully eyeing the ginger. Hinata flinched and looked down before eyeing the blond with gloom.

“Sorry,” Hinata started, “the truth is... I was glad to clean the gym with you since I wanted to say something. But it isn’t a confession! It’s more like... a question or something like that.” Hinata fumbled with his words in the end. “I just want to ask... if I was a friend to you.” Hinata looked away in embarrassment. Tsukishima gawked at the statement. How that appeared on Hinata’s mind and why the ginger thought about it seemed too complex for the blond to think about so he sighed.

“Are you rejecting me?” Tsukishima asked calmly. Hinata froze.

“Well... not exactly – "

“So you want to date me?” Tsukishima interrupted with an amused expression, causing Hinata’s blood to rush to his face.

“No! But,” Hinata looked away, “I don’t wanna date someone who’s not serious with me. They have to at least... prove themselves or something...” Hinata pouted and fiddled with the end of his scarf.

Tsukishima paused. One second, two seconds, three seconds... Tsukishima couldn’t hold himself back, he sneered at what Hinata said before declaring, “So you want me to court you? If that’s what you want, then okay. I’ll woo you in an old-fashioned manner.”

Hinata grumbled then made a small sound of stubbornness that sounded like “hmph”. Still shocked but slowly coming to terms with the sudden confession, Hinata glared at the blond with flushed cheeks then pointed at him accusingly before exclaiming, “G-g-go on! I won’t lose to you!”

With that said, Tsukishima smirked at the ginger. Oblivion. He knew that Hinata was still in that oblivious state so he just ignored the spouted nonsense from the shorter male and enjoyed the show he’d soon participate in. The blond just hoped that things would end in his favor.


	2. Unexpected

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Yeah, that was cool but you know what else is cool?” Tsukishima started. Hinata stopped, eyelids fluttering. With bafflement, the ginger asked, “what?”
> 
> “Dating me.” Tsukishima replied calmly.
> 
> Once again, Hinata went red before shouting in frustration and embarrassment. He turned around and was about to run away when he saw Kageyama on the left corner and Yamaguchi on the right corner. Hinata felt his heart drop while Tsukishima counted seconds before Kageyama exploded in angry fits.

After a very long time, Tsukishima didn’t hate a certain ginger’s smile after all.

Now that he was looking at it, the smile was warm and it was surely different from the cold air of December. Tsukishima didn’t hate it but he couldn’t say that he liked it. If he was urged to choose between that endearing smile and something else, then the blond would choose something else. That something was the flushed cheeks the ginger would give once Tsukishima successfully teased him again.

And it would’ve made Tsukishima satisfied if only a certain black-haired, milk-loving, setter wasn’t glaring at him every single time he decided to tease the ginger.

So here was Tsukishima, putting his shoes inside his locker when Kageyama appeared out of nowhere and slammed the locker closed. Fortunately, the blond didn’t jump but he was certainly surprised by the abrupt action. Clicking his tongue in irritation, Tsukishima faced Kageyama.

“What? Are you a bully now?” the blond queried as he looked down on the setter. Kageyama ignored the question and snarled at the taller male.

“What the hell are you doing to Hinata? He’s losing focus when we’re practicing and I bet you did something to him!” Kageyama exclaimed in frustration. The blond was glad to have caused Kageyama irritation but he didn’t really fancy the idea of him being cornered by the black-haired setter. Tsukishima also didn’t like that people were glancing at them with interest before whispering to their group of friends. The blond hated nothing more than grabbing attention.

Pushing the setter away, Tsukishima said, “I didn’t do anything. Go ask the shrimp.” Afterwards, he walked away, content with the response he gave. Kageyama groaned and was about to chase after him when he thought about the time. He had to go to class if he didn’t want to be scolded so Kageyama clicked his tongue and stomped to his room.

Once the commotion was all over, Tsukishima sighed in relief. He soon started thinking about short orange-haired man and how he would court (more like tease) him.

///

Yamaguchi knew that something was up with his dinosaur-loving, bespectacled, sarcastic childhood friend. The freckled man could sense it so in an attempt to find out what it was, he thought about asking the blond but when he did, Tsukishima narrowed his eyebrows and stared at him as if Yamaguchi was zapped into an alien. Yes, the comparison was ridiculous but apparently, so was Yamaguchi’s question. How could something be up with Tsukishima? Just the thought of the stoic male having a problem seemed absurd.

But not until Yamaguchi found something weird. Suddenly, Tsukishima having a problem was not as absurd as it seemed. So what did Yamaguchi find weird? Well, it was the blond teasing Hinata more often than before and the ginger blushing in embarrassment. Now, that seemed normal except for the fact that Hinata would blush just by Tsukishima being close to him.

Yamaguchi was perplexed. What the heck happened between the two? Something seemed off yet oddly sweet. Yamaguchi could almost feel the answer coming to him until he recalled something. The freckled male stopped and frowned. He gazed at Tsukishima before glancing solemnly towards Hinata. Forget about what happened to the two, Yamaguchi wanted to have a talk with Hinata. And because of that resolve, after practice, Yamaguchi went to search for Hinata but just when he thought he would solo the ginger and talk to him about something important, he accidentally overheard a conversation that Tsukishima and Hinata had.

“Argh! Stop teasing me! You said you would woo me, not bully me!” Hinata exclaimed.

“I changed my mind.” Tsukishima indifferently replied.

Hinata hissed in annoyance as he angrily downed his water bottle. The ginger kept quiet until he finished his bottle. After that, he put a cap on it and aimed it at the nearest trash can. Tsukishima watched the shorter male while Hinata was biting his lower lip as he shot the bottle inside the trash can. Once it got in, Hinata jumped for joy. He turned to the blond with an ecstatic face.

“See that?! I shot it inside the trash can! Wasn’t it cool?!” Hinata loudly said as he did a small dance of victory. Tsukishima face-palmed and wondered why he liked the orange-haired middle-blocker. All of a sudden, an idea entered his mind.

“Yeah, that was cool but you know what else is cool?” Tsukishima started. Hinata stopped, eyelids fluttering. With bafflement, the ginger asked, “what?”

“Dating me.” Tsukishima replied calmly.

Once again, Hinata went red before shouting in frustration and embarrassment. He turned around and was about to run away when he saw Kageyama on the left corner and Yamaguchi on the right corner. Hinata felt his heart drop while Tsukishima counted seconds before Kageyama exploded in angry fits.

On the other hand, Kageyama and Yamaguchi glanced at each other with stun before placing the attention back to Hinata and Tsukishima.

One.

Two.

Three.

“The hell was that about?! Hinata dating you?! Like hell that would happen! I won’t allow it! Hell no!” Kageyama shouted in disapproval while Yamaguchi panicked and tried to calm Kageyama down as a result of frantic thinking. Hinata felt his soul leave his body as Tsukishima tried to stay calm. He shouldn’t lose patience and insult Kageyama. It would only make matters worse. If possible, Tsukishima had to treat it like meeting your fiancé’s father. He had to stay calm and well-behaved.

Except, Kageyama wasn’t Hinata’s father and nor was Hinata Tsukishima’s fiancé. So the blond threw his decentness out and smirked.

“Why are you dictating Hinata’s life? Oh wait! You like being in control so that’s expected of you! After all, you’re a – “

“You better not say that shit again!” Kageyama cut the blond male’s sentence, very much aware of what Tsukishima would say next.

“Kageyama, calm down!” Yamaguchi said in panic.

“Listen to Yamaguchi, Kageyama!” Hinata agreed. Kageyama snarled at him causing Hinata to wince and back away, hiding behind the first person he was near with, which was Tsukishima. When Kageyama saw this, he went silent. The three men gazed at the black-haired male and stood cautiously. All of a sudden, Kageyama saw an empty water bottle so he grabbed it and hurled it towards Hinata. The ginger yelled in panic as he hid behind Tsukishima, resulting for the blond male to accept the throw. With his face, of course.

The area went silent. Crows were heard and once again, snow fell. Tsukishima scoffed before he grabbed the water bottle again. He looked at it before glancing at Kageyama with a pointed stare. Yamaguchi knew what was up this time. It was evident that if he didn’t stay away from Kageyama, Yamaguchi would get involved with the blond so to keep himself safe, Yamaguchi ran to Hinata. Soon, Hinata and Yamaguchi were watching and shivering in the distance while their two respective partner threw empty water bottles at each other.

As Tsukishima threw a water bottle at Kageyama, the setter groaned and dodged before grabbing another bottle and hurling it towards the blond male but when Tsukishima avoided it, Kageyama froze. Hinata and Yamaguchi gawked as the piece of plastic flew towards none other than the face of their sweet and timid blonde manager, Yachi.

Kageyama and Tsukishima halted as they eyed Yachi with a blank stare. Hinata and Yamaguchi, on the other hand, gazed anxiously at the blonde female. Hinata started feeling like he was ready to bawl his eyes out and break down in front of his friends, having figured that things would go awfully awry while Yamaguchi thought about the possibilities of Yachi leaving the club because she had enough crap to deal with and four volleyball-loving second-year male students were not in her list of dealing with.

Slowly, Yachi looked at Kageyama.

“Wa-was that... did you intended to throw that towards me?” Yachi questioned. Kageyama blinked and shook his head without a word. Yachi nodded in consideration before eyeing Tsukishima, who pushed his glasses up. Yachi wanted to burst into tears honestly but she endured the pain. Her forehead was literally aching. She just wanted to go home after helping clean the gym with Ennoshita and Tanaka. Was getting hit in the head by an empty plastic bottle really necessary to go through just so she could go home?

“I’ll treat you for some free food. Sorry.” Kageyama lamely apologized. The other three men gazed at him. Kageyama stared back. “What?” he blurted out.

“Shouldn’t you... I dunno, treat us as well?” Yamaguchi asked.

The five students didn’t speak until Hinata dramatically raised his hand and shouted, “No! Kageyama shouldn’t treat us to food! It’s dangerous to eat together!”

Tsukishima gazed at Hinata before catching a glimpse of Kageyama so the blond looked at the setter’s way only to see him giving Tsukishima a look that the blond could only interpret as “Why did you like that dumbass? Are you a dumbass? Are you really sure you wanna date that dumbass?”

In the end, all of them went out to eat together despite Hinata’s protests. Once they were eating outside of a random store, the conversation begun.

“So... Tsukki’s asking Hinata out and Kageyama doesn’t want them to date each other,” Yamaguchi started, “but why does Kageyama not want them to date?” he interrogated.

Kageyama munched on his meat bun with irritation. Like hell he’d say it. He’d rather die than say those words.

“Kageyama-kun, please tell us. We’re supposed to be open with each other.” Yachi pleaded as she kept an icepack on her forehead. Yamaguchi agreed as he took a sip of his drink.

Hearing this, the setter glanced at Hinata, who flinched and looked away. Afterwards, Kageyama glared at Tsukishima, who glared back. Clicking his tongue, Kageyama swallowed his food and drank his drink. He slammed the box of milk down and sighed.

“Things don’t go well when dating,” Kageyama said, “and if those two dumbass dated, then it’s possible that things will end badly. When that happens... do you think all of us can talk and eat together like now if those two want to avoid each other because they broke up for some crap?”

The four students gaped at Kageyama. They completely misunderstood him. They were now aware of the opinion that Kageyama and what was shocking was that, Kageyama made sense. Yamaguchi mused about the thought. No doubt, Kageyama had a point that was why his worry and actions were justified. Yachi smiled gently and let out a small laugh. The four men briefly glanced at the sole female in the group before they looked away from each other due to sheer awkwardness. It wasn’t like the atmosphere was bad or uncomfortable, it was far from that. The group just didn’t know how to deal with affection since Hinata was usually the only one who showed fondness towards the four.

Hinata sniffed. The four quickly snapped their eyes towards the ginger and found him sobbing.

“What the – Oi, Tsukishima!” Kageyama instantly turned to the blond who raised his hands up since he had nothing to do with Hinata crying and was also worried and curious about why the ginger suddenly bawled his eyes out.

“You guys... all of you are my friends!” Hinata exclaimed.

The three groaned as they glanced at Tsukishima, who gave an empty look at Hinata. All of a sudden, Yamaguchi snickered so Yachi had to laugh as well. Kageyama eyed the blond before huffing.

“If you two break up, I’ll personally wipe your existence in this world.” Kageyama threatened. Tsukishima scoffed while Hinata sniffed before throwing a plastic bag at Kageyama’s ridiculous remark.

“We’re not even dating yet!” Hinata denied as he wiped his eyes. He caught a glimpse of a tissue being handed to him so he grabbed it. When he was about to thank the person who offered him the tissue, he found Tsukishima looking away with a tissue in his hands. Hinata sniffled and took the tissue before wiping his nose with it. As he did, he smiled with satisfaction.

///

It was Saturday and guess what? Like a cliché rom-com, Hinata and Tsukishima met. Of course, the meeting place had to be ridiculous that was why the two spotted each other inside a toy store. With Tsukishima holding a dinosaur and Hinata holding a doll and a tea playset.

The two didn’t say anything and avoided each other, shamed about the activity they were seen doing. They walked to the cashier and awkwardly, they went to the same counter. Hinata and Tsukishima gazed at each other so the ginger nodded and forced a smile before going to another counter. Afterwards, they got their items paid and once again, they exited the toy store at the same time. They walked to the same direction and even crossed the streets at once so Hinata, who was known to be impulsive, finally broke down and faced Tsukishima once they were on the other side of the road.

“Oi, don’t say it to anyone! I don’t like buying dolls and tea sets! This is for my little sister so don’t get the wrong idea, ok – “

“I don’t care.” That shut up Hinata. Tsukishima sighed and pulled the dinosaur figure close to him before pushing his glasses up. Hinata observed him carefully before he smiled softly. He pushed his hands inside his pockets but to his surprise, his wallet that was supposed to be inside his pockets was gone.

“Oh crap! I forgot my wallet in the store!” Hinata yelled before he pushed the bag of toys in Tsukishima’s arms. “Wait for me here! I’ll get my wallet back!” he said as he rushed to the shop. The blond looked down on the toys in his arms before deciding to wait for the ginger. As he waited, he watched the vehicles drive by. All of a sudden, a weird sensation that he was not in the place that he was supposed to be invaded his mind. A sense of unfitting and inappropriateness. Something else was supposed to happen but Tsukishima didn’t know what it was.

No. Nothing else was supposed to happen. It was just Tsukishima’s mind being a jerk. His mind was only playing with him so Tsukishima took a deep breath and exhaled.

To no avail, Tsukishima couldn’t push it off. He felt hot and it wasn’t supposed to be. It was winter and the air was chilly. He could see the Christmas lights on various stores so why did his body sweat even more than when he was practicing or playing volleyball? Why did his skin burn and why did he feel suffocated and heavy? Tsukishima was slowly weakening as his vision started to falter. He closed his eyes and breathe deeply. He calmed himself and wondered if he caught the flu. After a few minutes, the blond opened his eyes and he saw Hinata on the other side of the road, smiling at him with the same carefree attitude.

Tsukishima wanted to puke his guts out.

Hinata cheerily waved and walked the streets without looking to the left. Tsukishima clicked his tongue. In the corner of his eyes, Tsukishima saw an oncoming bus rush by. Hinata paid no heed and kept walking with his bright and sunny smile. Tsukishima stepped towards the shorter male to try and get him to not cross the streets but when Hinata saw the blond and noticed how pale he was, Hinata got worried so he crossed the streets.

And there it was.

The truck and the ginger.

In front of the blond man’s eyes, an orange-haired man with the smile equivalent to the sun was covered with the color red. Unbelievable, Tsukishima thought.

Quickly yet seemingly in slow-motion, Tsukishima watched as the ginger laid on the ground, clothes red and tattered, bones sticking out, and the lips that the ginger once used to flash his smile was now filled with the pool of thick blood that gushed out slowly and surely. The scene kept repeating in his mind and it horrified Tsukishima.

The blond backed away and huffed in shock and utter disbelief. He gulped and felt true fear for the first time. Different from fear that he’d lose a match, Tsukishima suddenly preferred losing thousands of his matches just so he could erase the absolute dread of seeing someone he liked die in front of him.

Then out of the blue, the sound of a honk blew past Tsukishima and the next thing he knew, an impact has hit him and the toys in his arms were on the ground. Unmoving and afraid, the blond looked ahead only to see a hazy vision of Hinata lying on the ground.

At that moment, he could see that tears in the ginger’s eyes. A sudden recollection of what was supposed to happen and where he, Hinata and the other three were supposed to be. They weren’t supposed to be there. They were supposed to be somewhere and that was what Tsukishima didn’t know. If not here, where?

Tsukishima closed his eyes and listened to the shouts of the people who were trying to call the ambulance. The loud honks of vehicles and the fearful screams of kids who unluckily witnessed the whole thing. After a long year of apathy, Tsukishima felt sympathy for those children who saw two people die horribly.

After a while, the noise stopped.

And Tsukishima felt air immediately invade his lungs as he shot up and breathe desperately. He scanned his surroundings and saw that he was in his room. Tsukishima wiped his sweat before he checked his phone and found that it was Saturday. The blond slumped on his bed. He covered his eyes and recalled the blood and the bones and everything else that appeared in what he hoped was a dream.

Hinata.

Tsukishima glanced at his phone and contemplated on calling it but realizing that he might sound delusional, Tsukishima put his phone down and stared at his ceiling. To his surprise, his phone vibrated. He checked it, hands still shaking because of the nightmare that seemed too real to be a dream. The blond swiped through his phone and an unknown number appeared on his screen. It was calling him. Warily answering it, Tsukishima kept quiet and let the caller speak first.

Static noises. That was all he heard. After a few seconds, the call seemed to break and cut off until it finally stayed calm without white noise.

The blond was more than apprehensive now.

A voice suddenly spoke and said, _“Don’t get in the way... You weren’t supposed to die but he was. So stop it and stay away from him.”_

Hearing this, Tsukishima sat up on his bed and replied with, “Who is this?”

After that question, Tsukishima coincidentally glanced at his window, only to see a bird, floating in mid-air and not moving. The blond stood up and observed the scene outside. Just like the frozen bird, the few people outside stopped walking, one car was on halt and the other birds were in the same state as the bird near Tsukishima’s window. It was like a movie that was paused and it didn’t amuse Tsukishima.

_“Death is unavoidable. Wait for your turn, Tsukishima Kei.”_

The call cut off and to the blond male’s shock, the frozen living things outside started moving again.

Just by that, Tsukishima didn’t know what the hell he should do. He gazed at his calendar and saw the date. Clenching his hands, the bespectacled man knew that he had to go to a certain ginger. If he didn’t, the ginger would surely die.

“Tsk!” Tsukishima held his phone and swiped through his contacts. He found Hinata’s name and tapped on it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! This is the author!
> 
> Do you like the surprise? I hoped you did because it made me excited just writing this! I had to listen to various suspenseful songs and ost just to create something like this.
> 
> If you're confused about the story, don't worry! So am I (hehe, jk! Please suffer more!)
> 
> :)


	3. Crestfallen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “How many times would he die for you? Just kill yourself to end this.”

Walking away from the road and to the sidewalk. Rubber soles that loudly stomped on the asphalt ground. Huffs and puffs that exited their mouths. Certainly, there was no escape to the tragedy that seemed to chase after them.

Hinata stared at Tsukishima with confusion. He gazed at their intertwined hands and pondered about the situation that seemed to have occurred. On the other hand, Tsukishima greatly perspired despite the chilly winter wind. The fear that kept infesting his whole being, successfully making him feel weak and useless, was slowly exhausting him yet adrenaline urged him to keep evading the oncoming danger but no matter how much he tried, there was only one result.

Tsukishima’s own death. Repeated again and again in favor of Hinata’s life that seemed to matter more in the eyes of the blond. And the stranger with no face that appeared every time Tsukishima would die, just who was he?

How many times should Tsukishima go through his death just so the catastrophe would stop and their lives would move on? Was this a never-ending calamity?

“Tsukishima, where are we going?” Hinata frantically asked.

He didn’t know. Tsukishima had no clue where. He just wanted to find a place where he could avoid dying and hopefully save Hinata from the end that Tsukishima desperately tried to stop.

Eyes roaming around his surroundings, Tsukishima spotted the truck that should have killed the ginger a minute ago. Tsukishima then shifted his gaze towards the flyover in the distance and recalled how he died in an attempt to stop Hinata from falling. The blond clicked his tongue and kept walking. He passed by the store that would soon burst into flames and effortlessly kill him and the ginger if they stopped and rested inside then he looked at the area where he was supposed to be stabbed after a thief attempted to rob Hinata. It was no use. It was as if every place had a death flag that only Tsukishima could see.

“Tsukishima!” Hinata halted walking, making the blond stop as well.

“What?” Tsukishima asked with masked frustration. Hinata was a known dumbass but he wasn’t too dense when it came to figuring out the emotions his friends displayed. The ginger could see how troubled the blond was and it worried him. Tightening his grasp on Tsukishima’s hand, the ginger asked, “What are you doing? Where are we going?”

No answer. Tsukishima couldn’t respond to that. It would sound ridiculous and delusional especially when he was the only one who remembered going through various deaths just to protect the person he liked. Soon, he took a deep breath and looked at his surroundings. Riding a bus or a cab was out of the question since accidents were prone to happen but neither was resting inside a store since it would either burst into flames or get robbed by a bunch of thieves who would hold the two men hostage. Tsukishima went out of options. He didn’t know where to go anymore and he could feel his sanity slipping away. If this was what losing your mind meant, then Tsukishima could feel sympathy for people who were in that state.

Hinata furrowed his eyebrows and blurted out, “Hey, what’s up with –“

The orange-haired man’s sentence was cut off as the sound of people gasping outshone his voice. Hinata could see the crowd pointing upwards so he looked up and saw a bunch of beam falling and it was certain to drop on him.

Until a person pushed him away and afterwards, Hinata watched with utter hopelessness as the metal beams pierced through a certain blond man’s body.

Hinata gawked and backed away but in the process, he fell down and watched as the blood oozed out of Tsukishima. The way the metal beam stuck on Tsukishima’s body seemed to remind Hinata of an ice cream. It looked easy to do, to stab through a human body but in truth, it wasn’t. The thick, red liquid made Hinata puzzled, scared, anxious, dejected and in short, miserable. The mixture of emotions that crawled around his body froze him.

Gulping and sweating, Hinata was voiceless.

“I... what...” Hinata blurted out, despair evident through his two short words and his expression.

Blinking his eyes didn’t help. When Hinata batted his eyelids open, the blond man’s corpse was still in front of him. Covering his eyes, Hinata hyperventilated and was in the verge of spilling his stomach out. Nauseous and wretched, Hinata lowly sobbed as his head bowed down and his shoulders shook.

“He died again.”                                                

Hinata halted as he stared ahead of him. People were frozen, vehicles were unmoving and the snow that fell were fixed in mid-air but the seemingly paused scene wasn’t the one that shocked Hinata, it was the masked man in front of him.

“How many times would he die for you? Just kill yourself to end this.”

The ginger sniffed and placed his gaze towards the dead body of the blond male. He could almost see the broken bones sticking out of the blond man’s chest so he snapped his vision to the masked and hooded man.

“Do something,” Hinata spoke pleadingly, “please.”

The strange man eyed the orange-haired man with a blank gaze. He shortly glanced at the blond with the metal beam jammed on his body.

“From the very start, it wasn’t him who was supposed to die. Why does he keep getting in the way?” the stranger uttered with a hint of frustration before snapping his finger.

And the world that seemed to have stopped was put on rewind. Back to the moment where the two men were walking away from the toy store to the instant where Tsukishima was on his bed. Soon, time reverted back and Tsukishima laid on his bed with eyes wide open. Having failed once again, the blond pondered over his decisions.

Yet there he was, in front of the ginger’s house.

If going outside was dangerous, then staying inside would probably be the best choice.

And Tsukishima knocked. He waited for a few seconds until the sound of someone stomping was heard then the door opened and an orange-haired man’s head popped out. The blond was faced with the shocked and sweaty expression the ginger had so Tsukishima smirked and waited for Hinata to speak.

“Why are you here?” Hinata blinked as he pushed his phone inside his pockets.

“I’ll court you.” Tsukishima countered.

Hinata looked away and blushed. He motioned for the taller male to enter his house as he fussed about how he didn’t have any food to offer right now and how his mother and his sister were out to buy the groceries so Hinata was the only one inside the house. Tsukishima eyed the shorter male and sighed. As usual, Hinata couldn’t remember what happened while Tsukishima was left to agonize over it without a known solution.

Tsukishima let it pass and decided that it would be much better if Hinata didn’t know. Things would be complicated if Hinata knew. As he walked pass the entryway, he saw a picture of a young orange-haired boy with a cop who was carrying him. Tsukishima paused and gazed at it. Hinata noticed the action so he grinned sunnily.

“That cop is my dad! He looks awesome, doesn’t he?!” Hinata burst out into a bouncing bundle of joy. He started ranting about his father’s encounters with criminals and how Hinata thought it was so amazing to have a family you could be proud of. And how could Hinata forget to mention that his father kept a gun? Tsukishima kept silent, hands curled into a fist.

After a very long time, Tsukishima was repulsed by the ginger’s smile. Having seen death and Hinata’s reaction to him dying made Tsukishima sick. It wasn’t giving a warm feeling like it used to before, the smile seemed so cold and distant. A polar opposite of the way he saw the ginger’s beam before his countless deaths.

“Hey.” Hinata called out.

The two looked at each other and the taller male could see a glint of sadness in Hinata’s eyes.

“It’s about... well... never mind!” Hinata pushed his statement away and laughed with awkwardness. Hinata then said, “I’ll be going to my room so uhh... wait here, I guess?”

After that, Hinata dashed to his room and Tsukishima was left alone sitting in the couch. Scanning the area, the blond could see how intimate the place was with the family pictures and soft brown tones of the walls and the floor. It was as if he was invading a space he wasn’t welcomed in. Tsukishima stayed silent for a few minutes but when he looked to his left, he saw a phone on the floor, he calmly stood up. Gently, he trotted towards the phone and yanked it away from the ground. He observed it and realized that it was Hinata’s phone that the ginger may have dropped while running to his room.

Curious with what was on the phone, Tsukishima turned it on only to see various methods on how to commit suicide.

Tsukishima swiped through it and found methods of tying the noose that would be used for hanging oneself. Suicide by shooting oneself was also shown there. Tsukishima rushed to Hinata’s bedroom and once he was meters away from the ginger’s door, he softly trotted towards it. Gently twisting the knob open, Tsukishima pushed.

There was a body hanging on the ceiling.

The blond man’s shoulder slumped as he observed the room with terror. Pills, a gun, and a knife. Tsukishima let out an empty laugh as he realized that he interrupted Hinata attempting to kill himself. He eyed Hinata’s hanging corpse, the ginger’s fingers that looked red. He probably regretted hanging himself and tried to come down, Tsukishima thought. Keeping his focus on Hinata, Tsukishima felt weightless and empty. Slowly trudging towards the bed, Tsukishima grabbed the gun. It was heavy and cold, like his body. Forget about all of it, the blond wanted to rest. So aiming the gun in his head, Tsukishima looked at the hanged body of Hinata. Smirking one last time, he glanced at the doorway and saw the stranger with the hood and the mask. Once again, it watched him with its cold eyes.

“Tsukishima Kei, stop.” The stranger spoke indifferently.

Too late, the blond thought. He sent a sneer towards the faceless being before pulling the trigger.

 

* * *

 

He woke up again.

Tsukishima sat on his bed and placed his hands over his eyes. He could feel his palm becoming wet with the tears that silently fell. As he let his emotions out, his phone rang. Not bothering to put his glasses on, Tsukishima fumbled and reached for his phone. Once he got it, he answered the call only to see a call screen that seemed to show Hinata’s number. Tsukishima cleared his throat before he greeted with, “What is it, shrimp?”

“Tsukishima,” Hinata wept, “please stop! How many times would you die trying to take my place?! Just let me kill myself!”

The words that the blond never expected to hear from the ginger kept echoing. The fact that Hinata knew blew his mind and caused Tsukishima to tighten his grasp on his phone before he retorted with, “No.” Then unexpectedly, the sound of a click was heard.

“Hinata, what was that?” Tsukishima asked, worry etched in his voice.

“It’s a gun. The one you used to kill yourself with.”

After that, a gunshot was heard then the phone plummeted down the ground and what was heard next was silence.

Tsukishima failed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Kagerou days and DDLC reference intensifies)
> 
> Congratulations! Hinata died!


	4. Imbroglio

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Let's make a deal, Tsukishima Kei."

Kageyama glared at the grave.

“This dumbass... killing himself over something... tsk!” Kageyama snapped his head back and stomped away from the man’s grave.

Yachi sniffed and covered her mouth before walking away. Yamaguchi eyed the male’s grave before glancing at Tsukishima. The blond simply stood far away from the group and kept quiet. The snow that fell made the scene even cold as the atmosphere between the four people froze and was as brittle as a cookie. Anytime now, Yamaguchi was sure of it, their little group would break off and fade into the distance. Hopefully, Yamaguchi was wrong. Taking one last glance at Hinata’s grave, the freckled male bowed lowly before raising his head with sadness.

When Yamaguchi’s head suddenly ached.

The freckled male placed a hand over his temple as he groaned. He gazed at Hinata’s burial as a strange recollection entered his mind.

The sound of the roller coaster, no – It was a bus. It was the sound of a bus driving in a chilly winter day then a gunshot. Yamaguchi closed his eyes and groaned at the pain his head received. He could see something despite his eyelids shut closed. The image of a gun. Tsukishima. Suddenly, Kageyama shouted and Yachi covered her ears before she trembled with terror. All Yamaguchi could do was watch. He was useless and pathetic. Yamaguchi was a loser. A no good human being. The awareness was breaking his mind and the snow didn’t help cushion the tears that fell as he sobbed at the abrupt realization of how pitiful he was.

“Yamaguchi?”

The freckled male opened his eyes and saw Kageyama and Yachi in front of him, both sporting a worried look. Yamaguchi stared at his palm before wiping his eyes. There were no tears. Unsurely. Yamaguchi eyed Yachi and Kageyama, his eyes opting to look down on his feet rather than face his two friends and show his pitiful expression. The unforeseen and ephemeral dread he experienced was shocking as it is. Yamaguchi knew that it didn’t happen. Yes. It was all his mind’s way of telling him that he was tired and needed to rest. Yamaguchi smiled softly and bowed to his two concerned friends.

“Sorry... I’m just tired. Let’s go home.” Yamaguchi suggested. Kageyama nodded and walked ahead. Yachi stayed and kept her eyes on the freckled male before furrowing her eyebrows and turning her back on him to walk go home. Yamaguchi sighed in relief then faced Tsukishima.

“Tsukki, come on. We’re going home.” Yamaguchi called out.

“Go home first.” Tsukishima shortly replied. His childhood friend frowned before accepting his decision and leaving him behind. Once Yamaguchi turned around, Tsukishima observed his closest friend and narrowed his eyes. After a while, the blond gazed at the grave and frowned. He loomed closer and read the characters on the stone. Sun. Hinata had the character sun. The blond looked up and watched as the snow plummeted down gently. It wasn’t exactly late at night yet and it wasn’t that dark. The sun was away and gone, showing the azure sky and the white fluffy clouds. Tsukishima glanced down at the grave and thought of one thing. With that thought in mind, the bespectacled male rushed to Karasuno.

Treading through the blanket of snow, Tsukishima tightly wrapped the Prussian blue muffler around his neck and ignored the cold temperature. He could see the carbon dioxide exiting his body as a smoke while he huffed with each steps he would drop. Soon, he arrived Karasuno. Without hesitation, Tsukishima entered the school grounds and ran to the rooftop. If the stranger who always showed up when Tsukishima died was right, then he’d be there to see Tsukishima jump off the roof.

_“There are two directions my actions might take me. The first one is suicide without the possibility of being revived. The second one is time being reversed back to Saturday. I’m opting for the former.”_ Tsukishima pondered as he took one last climb to the rooftop. He stared at the door knob and twisted it. When he found that it wasn’t locked, Tsukishima puffed with relief as he pushed the door open and immediately being faced with the never-ending sky. Tsukishima trotted towards the end of the roof.

Once he was firmly positioned on the corner, Tsukishima took a deep breath and gazed down. He could see how high he would descend once he jumped off the roof. As the blond thought about his decision, he felt a presence behind him. Slowly turning around, he spotted the stranger he was waiting for.

“How many times do you intend on dying, Tsukishima Kei?” the voice shifted and Tsukishima couldn’t figure out which voice the stranger truly had. Ignoring the voice, the blond turned around and sneered.

“Who are you? Maybe I’ll consider moving on from the shrimp’s death after you introduce yourself to me.” Tsukishima had the audacity to smirk. The stranger eyed the blond with emptiness before the snow stopped falling mid-air. Tsukishima could see that the birds also halted on moving so he was left with the awareness that he wasn’t talking to someone human anymore.

“Let me rephrase my question – what are you?” Tsukishima spoke aloofly.

The being paused until the snow started raising then dropping all at once only to rise again. Tsukishima narrowed his eyes and watched with interest and anxiety. It was as if he was watching a lag in a game and could only sit and watch with helplessness

“What am I?” asked the stranger. “A symbol of oncoming death. A spirit in possession of a human’s body. A being all living things fear of. A grim reaper, if humans call it.”

Tsukishima snorted at how ridiculous his situation was. He glowered at the so-called grim reaper before asking, “If I’m not meant to die yet, then why are you here? Hinata died so you shouldn’t have any business with me anymore but why are you here?”

The being kept silent.

“You’re not meant to die yet.”

Tsukishima pulled himself and he could feel the end of the cement under his foot. If he moved inches back, he would certainly fall. Tsukishima was about to take another step back when the being spoke.

“Hinata Shouyo has made a choice. One must suffer for the happiness of others. That is the conclusion he gave.” The grim reaper said. Tsukishima’s eyebrows knitted as he grasped what the being said. Knowing that he wouldn’t get a single answer out of the being, Tsukishima positioned himself to step back as he gazed at the grim reaper with a gleam of anger. The being could see the underlying emotion behind the calm eyes of the blond. Under the mask of the grim reaper, the eyes that showed no emotion subsequently shed a single tear before he chose to give the blond male a chance.

“Let’s make a deal, Tsukishima Kei.” The grim reaper proposed. “Find out which human I reside in and I’ll stop Hinata Shouyo’s death. Along the search of the human I possess, be sure to prevent your mind from breaking.”

Tsukishima clenched his hands and considered the suggestion. He could search which human the grim reaper resided in but where would he start? Tsukishima had no clue.

“This is your only chance to save the person you like. If you accept the deal,” the being pointed ahead, “then jump and the rest will follow.”

There it was. It was now or never. Tsukishima could rest and keep playing volleyball but without Hinata, everything were screwed, not only for him but for Yamaguchi, Yachi, and especially for Kageyama. If Tsukishima was given the ability to change something, shouldn’t he use it to put something right in its proper place? An example of that was a death that shouldn’t have happened in the first place. Despite the grim reaper’s words, the blond had a feeling that Hinata wasn’t supposed to stop from living.

Sucking a sharp breath, Tsukishima turned around and jumped. The air that rushed passed by his body filled him then a sudden halt.

Tsukishima opened his eyes and spotted himself holding a certain someone’s crimson muffler. The blond looked ahead and saw the familiar unruly hair. The blond went back to the time where he would confess to the orange-haired male and he guessed that it was the time where he would start and change everything. This made Tsukishima smirk before scanning the shorter male’s face but unlike the blond male’s content grin, Hinata had a wretched expression

“Do you really wanna kill yourself again and again?” Hinata asked with frustration as his eyes welled up with tears. Tsukishima didn’t know why the ginger knew about everything but he would soon figure it out. For now, he needed to talk to Hinata.

“Why do you keep doing this?” Hinata queried.

“Because I like you,” was Tsukishima’s straightforward answer. Having forgotten and ran out of reasons, he simply said the first thing that entered his mind. Hinata didn’t like the unreasonable answer and sobbed with irritation, fear, and sadness, shoulders shaking with each weep. Tsukishima tightly grasped the muffler in his hand.

“Just say you don’t want to die, I’ll save you.” Tsukishima blurted out then the ginger’s eyes widened.

“I...” Hinata snuffled, “I don’t wanna die yet. Save me... Please.”

Those words were all that Tsukishima needed to hear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the grim reaper... yes, this is a supernatural being and you probably didn't expect a person with a scythe to appear but I swear, this is where the plot will revolve around. ㅇㅅㅇ


	5. Acquiesce

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You didn't save Hinata. You saved yourself and your own happiness. You'll just keep torturing Hinata with what you're doing. How selfish. How disgusting."

Tsukishima pulled his headphones down when he spotted Hinata sitting on the bench with Kageyama.

After Tsukishima made a deal with the grim reaper and revived Hinata, the blond was told to go to Hinata tomorrow to talk about everything they knew about the supernatural being and how they would figure out who it actually was. The blond willingly agreed before he and Hinata went back home.

"Tsukki!" Yamaguchi called out. Tsukishima paused and turned around to send a raised eyebrow at the freckled male. Yamaguchi felt confused as to why the blond stared at him that way but kept walking towards the blond nonetheless. Once he was a meter away from Tsukishima, Yamaguchi smiled softly. Tsukishima waited for him to speak until a snowflake got on his glasses. He removed his glasses and pulled his handkerchief to wipe the snowflake off. He glanced at Yamaguchi and said, "What? Why did you call me?"

The blond could see his childhood friend's face when all of a sudden, what seemed like an ominous smirk flashed on Yamaguchi's face. Tsukishima stopped wiping his glasses and blinked in shock. Yamaguchi's eyes gleamed with disgust before he said something out of character.

**"You didn't save Hinata. You saved yourself and your own happiness. You'll just keep torturing Hinata with what you're doing. How selfish. How disgusting."**

Tsukishima could feel his vision spin as colors began mixing with each other until he could no longer distinguish what was white and what was black but even when his sight became hazy, he could still see the disgusted and grim smirk plastered on his usually gentle friend's face. Out of anxiousness, he hurriedly put his glasses on to check if what he was seeing was what it should be. Once he got his glasses perched on top of his nose, Tsukishima found Yamaguchi's apprehensive face.

"Tsukki? Are you alright?" Yamaguchi queried.

"Yamaguchi, did you say something?" Tsukishima responded, staring at the freckled man with a stoic look. Yamaguchi's eyebrows knitted together as he replied with, "I was asking you about the notebook you left on your desk. It's unusual for you to leave your things so I was worried if you had a problem."

Tsukishima bit his tongue and nodded before softly uttering, "I'm fine."

Yamaguchi didn't believe him but smiled otherwise. He then looked at Hinata and headed towards them. Kageyama and Hinata stopped arguing and stared at Yamaguchi. While Hinata waved as cheerily as he could, Kageyama stopped glaring and calmed his anger. Yamaguchi immediately asked Hinata what he had for lunch to which Hinata responded with, "Curry."

As his three friends conversed lightly, Tsukishima felt a bit light-headed and dizzy. The sudden vision and voice his childhood friend displayed earlier ㅡ if that was actually Yamaguchi and not some supernatural being that copied Tsukishima's closest friend ㅡ truly creeped the blond out. It was so unlike Yamaguchi to say something like that but it was more unlike of Yamaguchi to say something about Tsukishima's actions for Hinata's sake. Then the statement from whoever said it earlier dawned Tsukishima.

 _"I'm only torturing Hinata with what I'm doing? Why?"_ Tsukishima pondered internally. He fixed his glasses and walked towards his three friends. His pace was slow, making sure that he wouldn't see nor hear something disturbing for the second time. As he did, Hinata coincidentally gazed at him.

Two seconds upon eye contact and Hinata happily beamed at Tsukishima. Seeing a smile that didn't look sad nor wretched puzzled the blond but it eased him a bit. Just a tiny bit but that small thing was enough of a reward for every death the blond had went through. Tsukishima looked away and kept treading towards the group. Once he was there, he kept silent and simply watched how Kageyama and Hinata bickered back and forth with Yamaguchi occasionally snickering at the two.

"Hey! It's Yachi-san!" Hinata pointed at the female as Yachi trotted with her lunchbox in hand. She smiled gently before greeting the others. And just like that, the group was complete again. It felt fresh and nostalgic, as if it was something Tsukishima hadn't experienced for thirty years and a half. But it was good. The weird emotion was pleasing.

"Hey, where are you going, Kageyama?" Hinata asked.

"To the vending machine." Kageyama answered calmly.

"I'll go with you!" Yamaguchi spoke up as he rushed to go with the setter. Yachi blinked before standing up and saying, "I'll just go get my water in my classroom." Yachi then went away, leaving Tsukishima and Hinata alone. Because they were left alone, Tsukishima felt the need to ask about something so he turned to the ginger then he caught Hinata doing the same thing.

"Uh... well... about yesterday..." Hinata had a flushed cheeks as he spoke coyly.

"You told me that you'll explain everything so say it." Tsukishima said stoicly. He was baffled as to why Hinata would blush but he pushed it away and focused on one important thing. The blond folded his arms and waited for Hinata, who finally stared at him with confusion.

"Explain everything? What do you mean?" Hinata asked sheepishly. Tsukishima raised an eyebrow and said, "Yesterday we had a talk. You told me about ㅡ"

"Don't say it! I'm already cringing because of what I said!" Hinata exclaimed as he covered his face.

Tsukishima was sure that nothing was cringy about asking for help. His bafflement grew bigger, getting even anxious at how Hinata was acting.

"Hinata, what happened yesterday?" Tsukishima probed, curious on how Hinata would explain yesterday's events. All of a sudden, Hinata went red as he timidly stuttered out, "You co-con-confessed to me and... y-you... uh... you said you'd court me..."

Tsukishima felt his heart skip a beat. He curled his palm into a ball as he started understanding what happened to the ginger.

"Hinata, that's not what we talked about yesterday." Tsukishima said.

"What? It isn't? Then what?" Hinata tilted his head.

"We talked about saving you and you told me you'll explain everything to me."

"But Tsukishima," Hinata narrowed his eyes, "I never said that."

Tsukishima felt all his efforts turn into nothing.

"Are you alright? You look pale, like, paler than usual. Hey! Tsukishima! Hey! Are you listening? What's wrong with..."

Hinata's voice was tuned out. The blond let his arms drop to his sides while his mouth curled into a frown. If Hinata forgot about everything, then does that mean that Tsukishima would face something that involves a supernatural being all by himself? Thinking about it, Tsukishima didn't know what else he should do. He expected this utter mindfuck but when Hinata told him that he wanted to be saved and that Hinata was willing to tell him everything he knew, Tsukishima swore that he saw a way to get out of the grim reaper's grasp. Yet here he was, frozen in front of a certain orange-haired man due to total confusion.

Tsukishima looked at Hinata. He caught the ginger's wary expression so he turned around and eyed the window that had a curtain that prevented Tsukishima from seeing what was behind the glass panes. The blond bit his tongue and calmed his mind. He inhaled deeply then exhaled slowly while his eyes were closed. He took a few breathes before opening his mind.

With a window in front of him, Tsukishima saw a reflection of himself. He batted an eyelid and saw Hinata through the window. The orange-haired male sported a worried face. Tsukishima closed his eyes again. He took one deep breath before turning around and opening his eyes, only to find out that he was inside Hinata's room again and the ginger's body stayed hanging on the ceiling, swinging left when Tsukishima sucked a sharp breath then swinging right once he huffed.

Tsukishima placed his hands behind his glasses as he swallowed his welling saliva.

"Tsukishima!"

The blond dragged his hands down from his eyes. He gaped at the ginger.

"Oi, do you wanna go to the infirmary? I'll go with you." Hinata muttered as he reached his hand out to feel Tsukishima's forehead. He tiptoed and kept silent as he tried to see if Tsukishima had a fever or not.

"You're kinda warm but not enough to be sick." Hinata uttered.

"Stop it. I'm fine." Tsukishima slapped Hinata's hand away and stepped back. He stared at Hinata with an empty eyes before slowly walking back.

"Hinata, forget about everything I said about liking you. I take it back." Tsukishima blurted out.

Hinata frowned. He was opening his mouth to say something when he shut it closed. He watched Tsukishima walk back with an indescribable expression. Tsukishima sent a serious wretched face towards Hinata, the first time he ever did. Hinata said nothing as the blond turned his back on him. Hinata then sighed in relief once Tsukishima strode away from him.

 _"That's fine. That's what you're supposed to do."_ Hinata internally said before looking up at the cloud-covered sky and the descending cotton from above. With that words in mind, Hinata smiled with content and melancholy.

This was how things should go. Tsukishima shouldn't have gotten involved in the first place and now that he backed out, Hinata could save his friends once again.

Hinata then laughed softly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How do you like it? I wrote this while listening to Don't Leave Me. Guess who sang the song~~~
> 
> Today's chapter is a bit confusing but I intended that, don't worry ~(^ㅅ^)~ I'll give the answer soon so let me keep torturing Tsukki and the others


	6. Brood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Yamaguchi, come on! Jump!" Hinata bounced as he kept motioning for the freckled male to jump.

"Hinata! Have you seen Tsukki?" Yamaguchi asked sheepishly.

Hinata blinked before smiling cheerily and saying, "He went away! He said he needed to study or something!" Yamaguchi paused to think about what Tsukishima would study. He and the blond were classmates so if he studied something then Yamaguchi should as well but from what Yamaguchi knew, there was nothing to review about, there wasn't even a homework for this day.

"Ahh... is that so? I'll go to him then. See you later!" Yamaguchi waved before treading to his classroom. He hummed a small song as he did. Yamaguchi kept a light mood and once he got inside the classroom, he went straight towards his blond childhood friend.

"Tsukki, you ㅡ" Yamaguchi stopped. He spotted the wistful expression of the blond and his curiousity that was slowly but surely growing ever since the day started became more demanding, telling the freckled male to talk to Tsukishima or he'd miss out on something huge. Yamaguchi kept silent though, knowing better than anyone that Tsukishima wouldn't confide his problems to anyone.

"Tsukki? Are you alright?" Yamaguchi finally asked.

"Mh-hmm." Tsukishima tapped his pen as he stared at his notebook, putting all his attention on the math problem his math teacher was still yet to discuss about. Yamaguchi knew that something was up if the blond could answer a problem that their teacher still hasn't taught.

Yamaguchi was about to say something when a random classmate slammed the door open and yelled that the teacher was coming. Yamaguchi's classmates hurried inside and because of it, so did he. Once everybody was seated on their designated chairs, the teacher entered and class started. The class stood up, bowed and greeted before sitting back again. Yamaguchi glanced one last time at his childhood friend before focusing on the board, only to feel drowsy. In an attempt to combat sleepiness, Yamaguchi tried pinching himself and while it did pull him out of his drowsiness, his alertness only lasted for five minutes before he felt sleepy once again. Unable to stop his heavy eyelids, Yamaguchi decided to take a short nap.

Laying his head on his desk, Yamaguchi closed his eyes.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, and ten. He opened his eyes, only to see that he wasn't inside the classroom anymore.

 _"What the... why am I in front of a pedestrian lane? Wasn't I in the classroom? Don't tell me I'm dreaming?"_ Yamaguchi mused internally. He looked around before staring on the other side of the street. He caught Tsukishima on the other side, holding his head as he looked pale and exhausted while sweating heavily. Yamaguchi felt worried but before he could cross the streets, he caught a glimpse of Hinata. Yamaguchi halted.

"Hinata!" he called out before looming closer to tap the ginger in the shoulder but once he did, his fingers touched nothing. Yamaguchi furrowed his eyebrows and backed away. He watched Hinata wave cheerily to Tsukishima, who looked sick. Yamaguchi could see the underlying worry Hinata had as he gazed at Tsukishima.

Then, Hinata took a step forward. But the bus was there. Yamaguchi felt his breath skip. He glanced at Tsukishima then Hinata.

"Hinata, no..." Yamaguchi weakly uttered. He reached his hand out but it was useless because Hinata was not hearing him nor does he see Yamaguchi and because of this, an emotion that Yamaguchi never expected came over him and his whole body shook with nervousness. Hinata ignored him. Step by step. Quickly. The ginger loomed closer. Until Yamaguchi helplessly watched Hinata get hit by a truck and the familar small body that Yamaguchi grew so fond of dropped on the ground with a loud thud and Yamaguchi swore that he heard a splat but he didn't want to know whatever caused that noise.

Yamaguchi looked across and found Tsukishima gaping at Hinata. Then he stepped forward but for Yamaguchi's sanity, Tsukishima shouldn't have crossed the street that way, the freckled male wouldn't be seeing two of his friends lying on the ground with blood under their body and bones sticking out, especially Hinata. How horrible Hinata's state was.

Yamaguchi was certain that he was in a nightmare now that he had seen two deaths.

"Yamaguchi..."

The freckled male could hear Hinata's voice calling out to him.

"Hey, Yamaguchi..."

He was shaking with terror as he covered his mouth to prevent himself from puking. Soon, Yamaguchi forced himself to wake up. He looked around him and saw people shouting in shock and trauma. Please, someone wake Yamaguchi up. It didn't matter if it was the teacher or the hottest student in Karasuno, Yamaguchi just wanted to open his eyes, escape the nightmare, and. Just. Wake. Up.

Then he sucked breath through his teeth as he snapped his eyes open and he shot up.

Yamaguchi successfully caught everyone's attention.

"Yamaguchi, if you want to answer the question, raise your hand, don't stand up out of the blue," the teacher joked, causing the class to chuckle. Yamaguchi didn't though. He gulped and calmed himself before nodding.

 

* * *

 

His head was filled with thought about that nightmare that came out of nowhere. Yamaguchi couldn't get his mind straight at how oddly mysterious yet enticing the dream was. But Yamaguchi wasn't hoping to actually see one of his friend get hit by an over-speeding truck, it was just that the thought that maybe the nightmare he had was some sort of premonition sparked a small fire in him. If Yamaguchi did save two of his friends, that would be great.

So from the time practice ended and he separated with Tsukishima towards the moment he finally laid down his comfy bed, Yamaguchi kept silent and pondered about the dream he had.

 _"No way that was some sort of premonition. I mean... it was just a dream... but come to think of it, didn't some people believe that those who are in your dream are people you're worried about? If that's the case then does that mean I'm worried about Tsukki and Hinata? I'm definitely worried about Tsukki but Hinata? Well... I guess? I mean, he's kind of acting weird when Tsukki's around but other than that, nothing's wrong with him..."_ Yamaguchi paused on his internal monologue before grabbing his phone. He asked the internet about what it meant if someone was in your dream.

"Hmm... dreaming of a friend can also be a bad omen... can refer to something that could sadden or traumatize you... an upset friend is a sign that they are suffering..." Yamaguchi muttered under his breath, "Tsukki's suffering? What about Hinata?" Yamaguchi swiped but found no explanation for his dream about Hinata so he searched something else. What did it mean if a loved one dies in your dream?

Yamaguchi found an answer immediately.

 _"You are ongoing a spiritual phase... you will soon be enlightened... big changes ahead... so Hinata and Tsukki's death is good for me, huh? I'm about to have knowledge about something and changes will happen... cool, I guess?"_ Yamaguchi thought before turning his phone off and placing it underneath his pillow. He shut his eyes and let himself drift of to wonderland.

Sleeping serenely, the freckled male's breath was uneven. Something in him needed to be solved. That dream did not feel like a dream. It felt like a warning. A sort of event that would soon happen and Yamaguchi needed to do something about it.

Shooting up and glancing at his window, Yamaguchi bit his tongue before standing up. He crept towards the window and the snow outside could be seen. Yamaguchi opened the glass pane and the cold winter air greeted him harshly. The male gulped before looking down. He gazed at the floor that was slowly being cushioned by the snow. Yamaguchi then heard someone tread through the soft ice.

 _"Was that... someone walking in snow?"_ Yamaguchi gulped as he mused internally. He observed the ground when he caught a familiar silhouette

"What the heck... Hinata?"

The silhouette looked up and once it did, Yamaguchi was certain that Hinata was waving at him.

"Hey Yamaguchi! Come down!" Hinata motioned with that same  sunny smile.

Yamaguchi grinned back before saying, "Okay! Wait for me theㅡ"

"No! Don't go through the stairs! Just come down here!" Hinata gestured for Yamaguchi to jump.

"What? But this is pretty high. I can't jump from here." Yamaguchi leaned on his window, his puzzlement growing ever-so-quickly.

"Yamaguchi, come on! Jump!" Hinata bounced as he kept motioning for the freckled male to jump. Yamaguchi was certain that Hinata was joking but the smile and the supportive gesture the ginger had unnerved Yamaguchi. Was the ginger serious? Did he want Yamaguchi to jump from the second building? Sure, it wasn't that high but it was high enough to give the freckled man a serious injury.

"Hinata, I can't do t ㅡ"

"Just jump, Yamaguchi." Hinata frowned, his eyes turning grim. **"Why can't you just jump? Why don't you just listen? Is it that hard to understand that I want you to die? So. Just. Jump. Head. First... so you can break your neck and die... please, Yamaguchi?"** The orange-haired male then tilted his head and sent a puppy look.

Yamaguchi froze when he heard that. This was not Hinata. He clenched his hands then looked behind him before returning his gaze towards Hinata but once he did, Hinata was not there anymore. Yamaguchi took a step back and hurriedly slammed his window shut before turning around.

Too bad for Yamaguchi though.

Hinata was on the bed and the wallpaper of the room changed. Yamaguchi knew completely well that this was not his room. This was someone else, probably Hinata's.

"I can't... this is too much... he's so stupid... that dumbass Tsukishima... why doesn't he stop?" Hinata blurted out while sobbing. He covered his mouth to silence himself before grabbing his phone.

"Uh... Hinata?" Yamaguchi asked uncomfortably as he loomed closer but when he heard someone answer the phone, Yamaguchi stopped and eyed Hinata, who finally broke down.

“Tsukishima,” Hinata wept, “please stop! How many times would you die trying to take my place?! Just let me kill myself!”

Yamaguchi paused and narrowed his eyes. Tsukishima taking Hinata's place? What did that mean? Yamaguchi then realized the last statement that Hinata exclaimed. His eyes widened before dashing towards the ginger but before he could do so, his feet stayed on the ground, immobilized.

"Hinata!" Yamaguchi yelled.

The orange-haired man cried when he heard Tsukishima's answer. He stared at the gun with uncertainty and nervousness.

A click was then heard.

"Hinata! Hinata, listen to me! Please hear me out! Don't pull the trigger! I swear, you'll regret this! You won't solve anything if you pull that trigger! Please, Hinata, I swear to god, you're not doing anything right with what you're doing!" Yamaguchi screamed desperately.

“It’s a gun. The one you used to kill yourself with.” Hinata replied to Tsukishima. He then closed his eyes and pointed the gun on his forehead.

"Hinata! Don't pull it! Please!" Yamaguchi begged but it went unheard.

Hinata tugged the trigger and everything he held on fell to the ground. His phone, the gun, the small hope of saving his friends, Hinata let everyone down and Yamaguchi was there to witness it.

After that, Yamaguchi woke up, drowning in cold sweat. He sat on his bed and started tearing up.

 _"What was that about? Why did I see that? Am I supposed to do something? Help Hinata out? Or Tsukki? What do I do?"_ Yamaguchi internally questioned himself.

Hands searching for his phone, Yamaguchi grabbed it and immediately swiped through his contacts. Who should he call? Who would hear him out and not judge him? Who would say something straightforward and snap him out of his anxiety? Who could do that?

Then he saw it. Yamaguchi stared at the name before sniffing. He swallowed his nervousness before tapping the name, hoping they would help him out.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And Yamaguchi's slowly being aware.


	7. Dissemble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You're crossing the line." Tsukishima gritted his teeth.
> 
> "Am I?" Yamaguchi huffed.

"Eh? Tsukishima... and Yamaguchi? Why are both of you here?" Hinata asked sheepishly.

"Uh... well... I just wanna hang out with you!" Yamaguchi grinned awkwardly. Tsukishima glanced at his childhood friend with a glint of irritation.

"Yamaguchi, can you spend some time with King instead?" Tsukishima spoke sharply.

"Uh... no. I want to spend time with Hinata." Yamaguchi coyly smiled.

The blond was irritated now and Yamaguchi did not like irritating the blond.  He knew better than anyone what would happen if Tsukishima was annoyed or simply not in the mood to take a joke. Yamaguchi didn't even know what was causing his friend to act  that wau but he hoped Tsukishima wouldn't start roasting him out of nowhere.

"You two... can I leave now?" Hinata queried.

"Hinata, do you wanna ㅡ"

"Let's go out, ㅡ"

Hinata gawked at Tsukishima and Yamaguchi's suddem synchronized speech. He backed away and folded his arms before sulking then saying, "You two are teasing me again, aren't you? You two are mean!"

Yamaguchi smiled lamely while Tsukishima pushed his glasses up.

"I actually wanna spend time with you though." Yamaguchi blurted out. Tsukishima was more than irked. How could Yamaguchi suddenly say that he wanted to spend time with Hinata when he never showed any interest in the first place towards the ginger? The blond bit his tongue and kept silent. Meanwhile, Yamaguchi could feel Tsukishima glaring at him.

"Uh... Tsukishima looks pissed. Do you wanna spend time with me as well?" Hinata sheepishly asked the blond.

"What? I don't want your company. Just go with Yamaguchi if you want to..." the blond paused before uttering, "Both of you are lame."

"Are you serious, Tsukki?"

The sudden statement stunned Tsukishima and Hinata. They gaped at Yamaguchi and waited for him to say something else.

"Yamaguchi, what did you say?" Tsukishima asked seriously. Hinata gulped and felt a bit nervous.

"I asked if you were serious. Did you really say Hinata and I are lame? That's immature." Yamaguchi answered.

**"Is it immature? I thought it would fit you besides, I don't wanna use other words to explain how lame you are. It might offend you but I guess even an immature insult could hurt your feeble feelings."** Tsukishima countered.

**"Are you saying that I'm too sensitive? I'm nowhere near that!"** Yamaguchi snapped back.

**"Then stop getting hurt by elementary-level insults."**

**"I wasn't offended, I was calling you out because of how childish you are!"**

**"I wasn't."**

**"Yes, you were!"**

**"No. You just didn't like being called lame, don't you?"**

**"Yeah, keep saying I'm lame but at least I'm not a person who hides his feelings because he can't get over the fact that his brother lied to him! See who's more lame between us?"**

**"You're crossing the line."** Tsukishima gritted his teeth.

**"Am I?"** Yamaguchi huffed.

Hinata backed away before shouting, "Stop it! Don't fight!"

Tsukishima and Yamaguchi immediately stopped. They took a second to register what just happened and when they finally did, they froze.

"I... uh... I didn't mean to... I was just..." Yamaguchi stuttered, utterly nervous and puzzled by what he said. It was as if it wasn't him who was speaking anymore.

"Nevermind. I'm going back to class." Tsukishima looked away and walked ahead. He didn't know why he suddenly felt the need to argue with a childhood friend and he couldn't comprehend why Yamaguchi argued back. They never fought like a bunch of immature brats and the fact that they fought creeped Tsukishima out. Honestly, something was going on with him, the blond just couldn't figure out what was making him feel unscrewed in the head.

"Guys? Are you two gonna fight?" Hinata called out, stopping the two friends from walking away.

"No. We're going back to class. Sorry for making you uneasy." Yamaguchi smiled apologetically.

"No! Friends fight all the time! But don't fight again! It's creepy if you two do it!" Hinata beamed as he showed a peace sign. Yamaguchi sent a smile back. Tsukishima couldn't face the ginger and merely huffed when he heard the ginger's sentence.

"Ah! By the way, tomorrow is Saturday!" Hinata exclaimed sunnily. Tsukishima finally turned around and looked straight at the ginger's eyes.

"Hinata, let's meet tomorrow." Tsukishima said. He had to say it otherwise, he'd be risking something and he didn't want that to happen. He might've given up on liking the orange-haired male but that didn't mean that he'd let Hinata die easily.

"Eh? Why?! You said you ㅡ"

"Forget about what I said yesterday." Tsukishima intervened Hinata's sentence.

"Can I come too?" Yamaguchi queried.

Hinata was eager to say no so he took a deep breath then shook his head.

"No! Both of you can't go!" Hinata exclaimed as he made an X with his hands. Tsukishima scoffed while Yamaguchi dejectedly sighed.

"Sorry! I just need to be alone that day. We can go out with Kageyama and Yachi-san some other time! I promise!" the ginger grinned widely before heading to his class. Tsukishima warily gazed at the ginger. Of course, it was very pleasing to hear Hinata say that they'd spend time someday, if only Tsukishima didn't know what would actually happen and he could make that "promise" come true then he wouldn't be disliking the fact that Hinata said those words with a carefree grin.

When Hinata was gone, Yamaguchi suddenly had an urge to say something.

"Tsukki, there's something I need to tell you." Yamaguchi suddenly muttered.

"What?" Tsukishima replied.

"I want to spend time with Hinata... can you help me?" Yamaguchi smiled softly, as if he was merely asking Tsukishima to help him with his homework. The blond narrowed his eyes at his childhood friend before looking away.

Clenching his hands, he said, "No, Yamaguchi. I won't help you." Tsukishima walked away, his hands pushed inside his pockets.

Yamaguchi frowned when he heard the blond man's answer. _"Tsukki... you like Hinata... that's why I'm doing this so Hinata won't die and you won't suffer. That's what the dreams meant after all."_ Yamaguchi told himself, keeping his thoughts to himself to prevent sounding delusional from others who couldn't get him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is it confusing? Sorry (ㅜㅅㅜ)


	8. Desideratum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Don't shoot! Don't you fucking shoot that thing at the dumbass! i swear to god! You'll fucking die if you do!"

Yachi knew that something was wrong between three of her friends. She could sense the uneasy feeling that Yamaguchi, Hinata and Tsukishima had but Hinata was more discreet about it, to the point that Yachi wouldn't have seen it if she didn't see the conversation Tsukishima and Hinata had that one time. That conversation about the ginger being told to forget about being liked by the blond. Yachi kept silent and simply let it pass since she didn't want to intervene into a problem she wasn't involved in the first place.

So here she was, strolling around the town on a Saturday afternoon in an attempt to push her mind away from the problem three of her friends had. Yachi observed the surrounding and saw a bus pass by. She kept her eyes on it before sighing.

 _"What's wrong with those three? I wish I could help."_ Yachi mused internally before trotting away. She kept walking until she spotted a male.

Staring at Yachi with a puzzled expression, he decided to ask ber something.

 

* * *

 

Yamaguchi swore that he wasn't supposed to be roaming around the town on Saturday. He was supposed to be at home, watching some videos about anything he stumbled on the net but after a sudden recollection, Yamaguchi felt the need to find a certain orange-haired man.

 _"I talked to Kageyama about the dreams and he said that maybe I wanted to spend time with Hinata."_ Yamaguchi thought, recalling how irritated Kageyama was when the freckled male called him at 11 PM.

 _"But what about that suicide attempt that Hinata did? That can't be just a dream... Does Hinata want to... no. That's just ridiculous. Hinata isn't a person like that. I've went to his house and his family doesn't seem to have a problem, he doesn't even look like he has something to worry about so it can't be possible for him to feel depressed or something like that..."_ Yamaguchi pondered deeply. He crossed the streets with his mind preoccupied when a loud honk was heard, causing Yamaguchi to jump in surprise. He looked to his left and saw a car and its driver angrily motioning him to move away. Yamaguchi bowed before rushing away from the street.

Once Yamaguchi was on the sidewalk, he gulped anxiously. This whole issue about Hinata freaked him out but he needed answer. There was a reason why Yamaguchi felt this way and why he saw the dreams about the ginger dying and committing suicide but he didn't know what it was. Call him delusional but maybe it was so he could save someone. Yamaguchi couldn't fathom accepting that unexpected thought so he pushed it away and kept marching towards nowhere.

 _"Can I talk to Hinata about this? It's been three days and I can't normalize my thoughts. Maybe I should just talk to him."_ Yamaguchi thought and at that exact moment, he found Hinata sitting on the bench with a solemn expression.

"Hinata!" Yamaguchi called out.

When Hinata looked at him, Yamaguchi swore that he saw the same face the ginger made when he shot himself.

"Yamaguchi! Hey!" Hinata waved and beamed. Yamaguchi wasted no time to run towards the shorter male. Once he was a meter away from Hinata, the freckled male smiled softly.

"Hey Hinata, where are you going? Can I go with you?" Yamaguchi asked.

"Yup! I'm going to a special place! I can show you where it is! It's a pretty place!" grinning sunnily, Hinata stood up and slung his backpack over his shoulder. He gestured for Yamaguchi to follow him and without a single question, the taller male trailed behind him.

 

* * *

 

"Why do you want to find where Hinata is?" Yachi asked.

"It's about... nothing." Tsukishima replied, keeping his calm as he glanced at his wristwatch. Yachi frowned before she sighed.

"Something is bothering Yamaguchi. Hinata as well. I want to help." Yachi spoke softly, keeping her gaze at all the taxi that drove by. Tsukishima bit his tongue before saying, "It's best if you don't get involved. It's something you can't help with."

"Is that so?"  Yachi looked down before smiling sadly. "I'll be going home then. I hope you find Hinata." she waved bye at the blond male before walking away. Tsukishima clenched his hands and kept his mouth shut. He knew that pulling Yachi in something completely unrealistic would only scare the female blonde so pushing her away would be the best action to take, not just towards Yachi but even Kageyama and the others as well.

The blond man eyed Yachi as she entered a cab. Tsukishima kept his attention on the female until he spotted a familar silhouette sitting beside the blonde female.

 _"Is that... no."_ Tsukishima rushed to the taxi where Yachi was in. He could see the supernatural being that he made a deal with inside the cab that Yachi was in. Tsukishima forced himself to run but it was too late since the car started and drove away.

Yachi caught a glimpse of her friend chasing after the taxi she was in so she turned around to check what was happening. She saw Tsukishima saying "get off the car" but she wasn't sure if that was exactly what he was saying. Yachi turned to the driver and was about to tell them about stopping the car when she felt her phone vibrate. Picking it up, she saw a message from her mother, telling her to go home quickly for a surprise. Yachi smiled enthusiastically as she told the driver, "Um... please drive faster."

The driver sent a thumbs up before pushing the gas even more.

 

* * *

 

Yamaguchi and Hinata kept a silent atmosphere between them. They kept treading to the place Hinata called special. This made Yamaguchi curious as he wondered where the special place was. The two males continued trotting until they reached the park, to a place where no one seemed to be around. It was 1 in the afternoon and it was understandable why no one was around at this time of the day.

"Hinata, is this your special place?" Yamaguchi queried. No reply.

"Yamaguchi, is it hard?" Hinata blurted out. Yamaguchi blinked before chuckling lamely and saying, "What is? Studying?"

"No... I mean, trying to figure out what those dreams meant." Hinata pulled his backpack and unzipped it. He eyed what was inside the bag before staring at a wide-eyed Yamaguchi, who was unnerved by what Hinata said.

"I... how did you know?" Yamaguchi questioned as he took a step back. Hinata gazed at him gloomily.

"Yamaguchi, I'm sorry. I swear, this is all for the better." Hinata's eyes welled up with tears as he pulled out a gun from his backpack. Yamaguchi gasped as he took another step away from the ginger. Hinata sniffed as he let the gun hang on his hand.

"You and Tsukishima... both of you are acting like this because of me... sorry... this is all my fault." Hinata covered his face with both of his palm.

"Hinata, calm down and explain everything. Please." Yamaguchi pleaded.

"I'm sorry. You shouldn't have experienced this." Hinata responded while his shoulders shook.

"Hinata, tell me how this happened." Yamaguchi insisted.

Aiming the gun on his head, Hinata smiled with wretchedness as he uttered, "Forget about all of this. Forget about me. That's the only thing you can do right now." Closing his eyes, Hinata took a deep breath as he steadied his hold on the gun. He was on his way to pull the trigger when he felt the gun get snatched away from him. Hinata's eyes snapped open as he glared at the person who stole the gun from him, Yamaguchi.

Pointing the gun away from Hinata, Yamaguchi blurted out, "Explain everything... please. I don't want to keep guessing anymore. I need answers. Now."

Hinata stood steadily, eyes dropping tears without knowing when he would stop crying. Yamaguchi's hands shook as he aimed the gun towards a person he grew fond of. The two men sobbed and the tense air between them became suffocating. Yamaguchi wept and shook as he waited for a single word from Hinata. After a few seconds, Hina loudly sobbed.

"Hinata please! Just tell me what this all means!" shouted Yamaguchi, "I want to help and I'm sure the others feel that way as well but we can't do anything if you don't tell us what's wrong!"

"You don't understand! I don't need help! I want to die and you're not helping me!" Hinata cried. "Please! I'm doing this for you! For Tsukishima, Kageyama, and Yachi-san! Why do you keep getting in the way?!"

Yamaguchi's grip on the gun loosened. He was hiccuping and weeping as he let the gun drop on the ground. Before he could say something, his head ached out of the blue. He immediately held on his head as he groaned in pain. The ginger watched with worry as he loomed closer towards the freckled male.

"Yamaguchi? Hey..." Hinata muttered as he approached the man.

_**"Don't shoot! Don't you fucking shoot that thing at the dumbass! i swear to god! You'll fucking die if you do!"** _

_**"Yamaguchi, do something! Please! Help Hinata!"** _

_**"Shoot him! Shoot him now or I'll shoot her!"** _

_**"...it's okay. I'll be fine."** _

Yamaguchi broke down as he kneeled on the ground. He could hear voices of his friends as he felt the painful burning sensation on his skin, the heaviness on his body, and the tightness in his lungs. He couldn't breath properly and his body felt weak.

"Argh! I don't... ugh... help!" Yamaguchi yelled in agony, his mind replaying scenes that he hasn't experienced... or perhaps, he did and he just forgot about it.

"Yamaguchi, snap out of it!" Hinata shook Yamaguchi's shoulder.

"I can't... the bus... I'm sorry." Yamaguchi weakly said as he stared at Hinata with guilt and sadness. Hinata's eyes widened as he realized what this meant. Standing up, Hinata gaped at the suffering male as he took a step back. His phone vibrated so he pulled it out and answered it.

"Hinata, come to the hospital. Something happened." Tsukishima's voice was heard through the phone.

"Tsukishima... Yamaguchi is... he's suffering and soon... he'll go insane," said the ginger as he eyed the man on the ground. Yamaguchi had his arms wrapped around his head as he sobbed and cringed. Hinata sucked air through his teeth when suddenly, Tsukishima said something.

"Hinata, Yachi got in an accident."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll be honest with you, sometimes I get confused on this story's plot as well. But it's cool. I feel like I would get better at writing and creating plot after I finish this story ;)


	9. Verisimilitude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I don't need it! Just back off and leave me alone!" Hinata shouted in desperation.

"Tsukishima! Where's Yachi-san?!" Hinata exclaimed as he huffed and puffed. Yamaguchi anxiously stood behind the ginger while looking around in worry. Tsukishima wondered what was wrong with the freckled male but pushed his worry away before looking at Hinata.

"She's being treated. We just have to wait here." Tsukishima spoke softly.

A loud voice then erupted and Hinata recognized the voice as Yachi's mother, rushing to the emergency room to meet her only daughter. He cringed and looked away, guilty filling his whole system. Yamaguchi gulped and turned around, flinching every now and then. Tsukishima sat down the bench near the wall and pulled his glasses so he could wipe it clean.

"What happened to her?" Hinata queried.

"The cab she rode hit another car. The car hit where Yachi-san was so she was severely injured." Tsukishima answered.

Hinata sniffed and kneeled down as he placed his hands on his face. Yamaguchi shook and when he caught Tsukishima's gaze, he winced and gritted his teeth in remorse. The blond narrowed his eyes before be blurted out, "What's wrong with both of you? Something happened, didn't it?"

Yamaguchi swallowed his saliva before shaking his head. Hinata gazed at the two men as be started feeling confused.

"Yamaguchi, are you alright? Does your head hurt?" Hinata queried.

"I... Yes. I'm fine." Yamaguchi nervously spoke, eager to avoid Tsukishima's eyes. Hinata kept quiet as he took notice of the tension in the air. The three kept silent until Yamaguchi suddenly wept. Tsukishima was surprised but he stared coldly at his childhood friend, waiting for an explanation or some sort.

"Tsukki... why did you do it?" Yamaguchi sobbed as he wiped his tears with his hands.

"Do what?" Tsukishima furrowed his eyebrows.

"That! You just... you..." Yamaguchi ticked with terror and remorse before adding, "no... it was because of me... I'm at fault."

Tsukishima eyed his childhood friend sink on the ground, unable to say something due to bafflement. The blond didn't know why Yamaguchi acted like that and he didn't want to ask for an explanation right now. Not when none of them were mentally stable. Tsukishima then glared at Hinata.

"Hinata... you know something, don't you?" he interrogated, causing Hinata to flinch.

"What? What are you talking about?" the ginger responded.

"You said something when I called you... it's about Yamaguchi going insane." Tsukishima spoke sharply.

Hinata frowned before saying "I don't ㅡ"

"Stop lying. Do you think I want to keep suffering to save you?" Tsukishima spoke indifferently. Hinata froze before his nervous face morphed into a frustrated one.

"If you don't wanna save me, then you should've backed away from the very start!" Hinata yelled. This caused Tsukishima to scowl.

"This would've been solved if you told me everything you know but instead, you acted as if telling me would make you crazy." Tsukishima snapped back.

The ginger stared pointedly at the blond as he countered with, "It won't make me crazy! It would make _you_ crazy!"

Yamaguchi kept silent as he covered his ears. The memories flooded his brain and the Truth that Hinata knew made Yamaguchi mentally break down. This was not the answer Yamaguchi wanted. This was beyond human life and normality. The Truth was even worse and the awareness tortured him endlessly. How could Hinata take the Truth without suffering and staying in pain?

"If you know something, tell me. I..." Tsukishima paused and clenched his hand, "I want to save you."

"I don't need it! Just back off and leave me alone!" Hinata shouted in desperation. He gazed at Tsukishima and saw the unexpected pain hidden in the blond man's eyes. Hinata looked away and didn't bother saying another word.

 

* * *

 

Kageyama frowned. He could see Hinata rushing to Tsukishima while Yamaguchi anxiously lagged behind the ginger. The three were at the hospital and the only one who wasn't informed about Yachi's accident was Kageyama. Or at least, that was what the three men believed. Nonetheless, Kageyama didn't need to be told. He already knew what happened and why it did. The black-haired male knew better than anyone else.

Giving one last glance at his friends, Kageyama's frown deepened as he turned his back on them and walked away. He kept striding away from the three men. Kageyama clenched his hand before pulling the mask away from his face. Kageyama pushed the hood off of his head and he let the snow fall on his hair.

It was him. The body the grim reaper lived in was none other than him but it wasn't because he was born as one, it was because his body was chosen to be resided by a spirit who meant death ever since that time. Kageyama was a mere human who understood what life was and it was because of that one moment. That day where the supernatural being picked him and possessed his body, turning Kageyama into a vessel who was forced to watch people he started caring for turn into humans who suffered and died again and again, slowly turning insane with each seconds that passed.

Kageyama gritted his teeth as he passed by a glass. He stared at his reflection and scowled at himself. All of a sudden, his own image smirked at him before blurting out, **"Just a little more. You'll soon be free from my possession."**

"Fuck off." Kageyama uttered before walking away.

 _"Those dumbasses... Hinata, Tsukishima, and Yamaguchi... why can't they think right? Why do they keep torturing themself?"_ Kageyama mused internally. He stomped to his way home as he did.

This whole situation made Kageyama feel weak and stupid. He could do nothing but watch as his friends slowly become mentally broken. If only they could find who the grim reaper possessed, then Kageyama would be free from all of this but no, he had to witness it all.

Hinata's countless suicide attempts and accidents, Tsukishima's many attempts to save Hinata and his various sacrifices, Yamaguchi's insanity slowly building up, Yachi's helplessness as she silently watched her friends turn cold and fragile, and the grim reaper's manipulation of the personality of Tsukishima and Yamaguchi, which caused the two childhood friends to mysteriously argue; This scared Kageyama, much more than he would ever accept and believe. Yet Kageyama couldn't do a single thing nor say one word just so he could save his friends. It was unbelievable how much fear Kageyama had. It was beyond what he could ever imagine, it was beyond losing a volleyball match. And the anxiety he felt, it was way worse than waiting for the ball to drop on the ground without anyone receiving it. Kageyama was a mere tool for a supernatural being, he was not allowed to help people he thought of as friends and therefore, Kageyama was useless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kageyama.... did you expect this???


	10. Incipient

From what he could remember, it started like this...

Hinata smiled at the sky. The azure color and the white fluffy cottons decorated the skies and the snowflakes that gently dropped from the heavens seemed to make the ginger's mood float.

"Oi, stop daydreaming and go back inside. Ennoshita-san's searching for you." Kageyama's voice was suddenly heard so Hinata looked at his partner and showed an even brighter and wider beam.

"Isn't the sky cool? It makes me want to fly so I can touch it." Hinata mused in daze. Kageyama narrowed his eyes at the shorter male before he blurted out, "You can't touch the sky, dumbass."

Hinata's lips tugged down before a growl escaped his throat and he glared at the setter. "Shut up! Can't a person dream?!" yelled the ginger.

"Go dream some other time. Ukai-san is getting impatient with both of you."

Hinata and Kageyama snapped their eyes to the left and spotted Tsukishima with an irritated look. The blond observed the two men's expression and saw how different it was. While Kageyama had a pissed off look, Hinata showed his sunny grin and his cheeks were flushed, whether the ginger blushed because of the cold weather or not, Tsukishima didn't know. He huffed with annoyance before turning his back on the odd duo.

"If you two wanna keep spending time alone here, I can tell the others to not interrupt your precious time together." Tsukishima blurted out, irritation evident in his voice.

"What?! No way! We don't wanna spend time together!" Hinata retorted as he stomped to the blond man's side.

"Like hell, I want to be alone with this dumbass." Kageyama groaned, making sure to go to the gym first.

Tsukishima gazed at the setter with exasperation before he sighed. Why did he get himself involved with weird people? To top it off, there was the ginger beside him who trailed behind him like a chick who followed its mother.

"Will you stop following me?" the blond uttered.

"Eh? Why? We're going to the same place so we might as well go there together." Hinata blurted out. Tsukishima couldn't even say something snarky to the ginger's response. The blond scoffed and kept his attention in front, blaming his stupid emotions for not listening to his brain and ending up liking the shorter male.

"Hey Tsukishima."

"What?"

"Uh... well... never mind!"

The blond could feel his stress level rising. Tsukishima couldn't fathom the need to call someone's name, only to say nothing or avoid talking once the person they called asks why. Why did people think that was fine and acceptable? That was not alright! It was stress-inducing and it raised the blond man's anxiety, not that he had one but still, he was anxious and he wanted to know why the person called him out. Yet even with these thoughts, Tsukishima said nothing and masked his emotions.

The day then went on until some mysterious coincidence happened.

Hinata and Tsukishima were tasked to clean the gym together.

So there they were, cleaning the gym and staying quiet until Hinata couldn't help but tell a story that he heard from a certain friend from Tokyo who had dyed his hair. Tsukishima groaned as he heard the rant of the ginger but instead of doing something to stop the shorter male, the blond simply let Hinata talk his head off while both of them cleaned. The atmosphere between the two of them were luckily peaceful and neither of them wanted to kill each other.

"I think Kenma should cut his hair. Even Kuroo-san agrees with me!" Hinata placed the last ball inside the basket as he spoke cheerily.

"And? Are you finished talking about your tiny crush on Nekoma's brain?" Tsukishima quipped.

"What? Kenma isn't – where did you get that idea?!" Hinata exclaimed, face red. Tsukishima snickered at the reaction he got.

"Stop talking about him if you don't want me to assume that you have a crush on him. It's irritating." Tsukishima said.

Hinata's eyes widened before he grinned teasingly and had the audacity to utter, "Why? Are you jealous?"

The blond scoffed in disbelief before staring pointedly at the orange-haired male. Hinata gulped and realized that he was digging his own grave when he said that. In order to avoid his death, Hinata laughed sheepishly and told the blond that he was joking as he rubbed the back of his neck. Tsukishima kept glowering at the shorter male before decided to say, "I'm jealous so you should stop it."

Obviously, this sent the ginger into a stuttering and blushing mess who couldn't form a single clear sentence that could be understood easily. Tsukishima folded his sentence and raised an eyebrow. Hinata hyperventilated and in an attempt to calm himself, he breathed deeply and slowly counted from one to ten.

Hinata then gazed at the blond. The fact that the ginger was slightly titling his head and looking up made his eyes somehow give the effect of an adorable, puppy eyes and it did not work on Tsukishima... or at least that was what the blond hoped.

Placing a palm beside his mouth, Hinata whispered "I like you."

Tsukishima took a second to register what he heard before he said, "I don't like you."

This shocked Hinata as he dropped his hand and gaped at the blond. "But you said you were jealous earlier!" he exclaimed with frustration.

"And? Did you think I like you just because I was jealous?" The blond sneered.

"Why else would you be jealous if you don't like me?!" Hinata grunted.

"Do you realize how conceited you sound right now?" Tsukishima countered.

Hinata froze and after three seconds, he covered his face in embarrassment as he yelled about how he shouldn't have confessed so early and how he wrongly assumed that the taller male liked him just because Hinata heard that he was jealous. Tsukishima ended up snickering at how dumb the short male was but beyond all of his snickers and teases, the blond was glad that the ginger caught on and confessed first. Tsukishima would take the satisfaction of knowing that he wasn't the one who confessed first besides, the blond didn't need to worry about rejection.

Smirking smugly, Tsukishima said, "Stop whining. I'll go out with you."

Hinata immediately paused.

"Really?" he asked.

Tsukishima nodded.

"We're dating?" he asked again.

Tsukishima nodded for the second time.

After that, any people would've guessed what happens when an energetic man gets a lover. Being the said energetic person, Hinata had a small outburst of delight which led to Tsukishima slightly regretting his choices.

 

* * *

 

Yamaguchi was on his way, searching for his childhood friend. He was humming when he recalled something weird.

 _"Ever since Tsukki cleaned the gym with Hinata, he somehow seemed to be close to Hinata... it's Friday now and they still act really weird."_  Yamaguchi mused and as he walked, he accidentally heard two people talking and guess who it was? It was Tsukishima and Hinata.

"Look! I'll shoot this in the trash!" Hinata raised a plastic bottle as he aimed it in the garbage bin. He shouted "Kobe" as he threw the bottle and once it got in, the ginger cheered and gazed at the blond beside him. Tsukishima was amused.

"What? Do you want me to give you a prize?" Tsukishima queried.

"What prize?" asked Hinata.

"A kiss."

Once again, Hinata went red before shouting in frustration and embarrassment. He turned around and was about to run away when he saw Kageyama on the left corner and Yamaguchi on the right corner. Hinata felt his heart drop while Tsukishima counted seconds before Kageyama exploded in angry fits.

On the other hand, Kageyama and Yamaguchi glanced at each other with stun before placing the attention back to Hinata and Tsukishima.

One.

Two.

Three.

"The hell was that about?! Hinata kissing you?! Like hell that would happen! I won't allow it! Hell no!" Kageyama shouted in disapproval while Yamaguchi panicked and tried to calm Kageyama down as a result of frantic thinking. Hinata felt his soul leave his body as Tsukishima tried to stay calm. He shouldn't lose patience and insult Kageyama. It would only make matters worse. If possible, Tsukishima had to treat it like meeting your fiancé's father. He had to stay calm and well-behaved.

Except, Kageyama wasn't Hinata's father and nor was Hinata Tsukishima's fiancé. So the blond threw his decentness out and smirked.

"Why are you dictating Hinata's life? Oh wait! You like being in control so that's expected of you! After all, you're a – "

"You better not say that shit again!" Kageyama cut the blond male's sentence, very much aware of what Tsukishima would say next.

"Kageyama, calm down!" Yamaguchi said in panic.

"Listen to Yamaguchi, Kageyama!" Hinata agreed. Kageyama snarled at him causing Hinata to wince and back away, hiding behind the first person he was near with, which was Tsukishima. When Kageyama saw this, he went silent. The three men gazed at the black-haired male and stood cautiously. All of a sudden, Kageyama saw an empty water bottle so he grabbed it and hurled it towards Hinata. The ginger yelled in panic as he hid behind Tsukishima, resulting for the blond male to accept the throw. With his face, of course.

The area went silent. Crows were heard and once again, snow fell. Tsukishima scoffed before he grabbed the water bottle again. He looked at it before glancing at Kageyama with a pointed stare. Yamaguchi knew what was up this time. It was evident that if he didn't stay away from Kageyama, Yamaguchi would get involved with the blond so to keep himself safe, Yamaguchi ran to Hinata. Soon, Hinata and Yamaguchi were watching and shivering in the distance while their two respective partner threw empty water bottles at each other.

As Tsukishima threw a water bottle at Kageyama, the setter groaned and dodged before grabbing another bottle and hurling it towards the blond male but when Tsukishima avoided it, Kageyama froze. Hinata and Yamaguchi gawked as the piece of plastic flew towards none other than the face of their sweet and timid blonde manager, Yachi.

Kageyama and Tsukishima halted as they eyed Yachi with a blank stare. Hinata and Yamaguchi, on the other hand, gazed anxiously at the blonde female. Hinata started feeling like he was ready to bawl his eyes out and break down in front of his friends, having figured that things would go awfully awry while Yamaguchi thought about the possibilities of Yachi leaving the club because she had enough crap to deal with and four volleyball-loving second-year male students were not in her list of dealing with.

Slowly, Yachi looked at Kageyama.

"Wa-was that... did you intended to throw that towards me?" Yachi questioned. Kageyama blinked and shook his head without a word. Yachi nodded in consideration before eyeing Tsukishima, who pushed his glasses up. Yachi wanted to burst into tears honestly but she endured the pain. Her forehead was literally aching. She just wanted to go home after helping clean the gym with Ennoshita and Tanaka. Was getting hit in the head by an empty plastic bottle really necessary to go through just so she could go home?

"I'll treat you for some free food. Sorry." Kageyama lamely apologized. The other three men gazed at him. Kageyama stared back. "What?" he blurted out.

"Shouldn't you... I dunno, treat us as well?" Yamaguchi asked.

Kageyama emptily eyed the freckled male until Hinata suddenly raised his hand and shouted, "I want meat bun!"

Soon, the others stated what food they want and Kageyama just clicked his tongue, knowing that he had no choice but to buy what his friends wanted. Once they were eating outside of a random store, the conversation begun.

"So... Tsukki and Hinata are dating and Kageyama doesn't want them to date each other," Yamaguchi started, "but why does Kageyama not want them to date?" he interrogated.

Kageyama munched on his meat bun with irritation. Like hell he'd say it. He'd rather die than say those words.

"Kageyama-kun, please tell us. We're supposed to be open with each other." Yachi pleaded as she kept an icepack on her forehead. Yamaguchi agreed as he took a sip of his drink.

Hearing this, the setter glanced at Hinata, who flinched and looked away. Afterwards, Kageyama glared at Tsukishima, who glared back. Clicking his tongue, Kageyama swallowed his food and drank his drink. He slammed the box of milk down and sighed.

"Things don't go well when dating," Kageyama said, "and if those two dumbass are dating, then it's possible that things will end badly. When that happens... do you think all of us can talk and eat together like now if those two want to avoid each other because they broke up for some crap?"

The four students gaped at Kageyama. They completely misunderstood him. They were now aware of the opinion that Kageyama had and what was shocking was that, Kageyama made sense. Yamaguchi mused about the thought. No doubt, Kageyama had a point that was why his worry and actions were justified. Yachi smiled gently and let out a small laugh. The four men briefly glanced at the sole female in the group before they looked away from each other due to sheer awkwardness. It wasn't like the atmosphere was bad or uncomfortable, it was far from that. The group just didn't know how to deal with affection since Hinata was usually the only one who showed fondness towards the four.

Soon, Hinata burst out laughing as he teased Kageyama then started saying how the black-haired male was certainly the little brother of the group and deserved affection and care and all sweet things. Yamaguchi snickered as well and said that the group would always take care of their little brother, referring to Kageyama for entertainment purposes. Yachi giggled while Tsukishima simply pushed his glasses up and hid the small smile he had.

"Oh! Kageyama's birthday is in December, right? What day was it again?" Hinata asked Kageyama, who scoffed and refused to answer.

"Kageyama-kun doesn't want to tell his birthday," Yachi paused before she glanced at Hinata. All of a sudden, the ginger had an idea.

"Let's go to an amusement park tomorrow! Since we don't know Kageyama's exact birthday, we should just act like tomorrow is his birthday!" Hinata suggested.

"Tsk! Are you serious?" Tsukishima grunted.

"Don't click your tongue! This is for our little brother's special day!" Hinata pointed at Kageyama as Yamaguchi and Yachi chuckled. Kageyama was aching to smack the shorter male if only he wasn't sitting far from him.

In the end, their little group agreed to meet up on Saturday.

 

* * *

 

But everything was going fine. Everyone was happy.

Hinata was sure that this was how everything started to change.

On their way home, they rode a bus and coincidentally, the bus had eight passenger, five of those are Hinata and his friends. They joked about random things and teased each other until a man with a gun entered the bus and threatened the passengers. The man who seemed to be on drugs warned everybody not to move and hear him out. He looked like he was only doing it because of curiosity, to answer a question if he could kill someone ruthlessly.

As the moment progressed, Hinata was sure that he, along with the others, were about to die.

Then, the man shot a random passenger. A mother. Her child was beside her.

Hinata could see the utter despair that gleamed on the naive young girl's eyes as the person, who symbolized as her hope, quickly ceased to exist because of a mere tug of a finger. Then, the stranger pointed the gun at someone else and... Hinata refused to recall what happened to him. Hinata hated what that person had done but the ginger knew that his friend couldn't be blamed so he accepted it and swallowed his anger and frustration. Afterwards, Hinata weakly watched as the bus got engulfed by fire, how and why it happened, Hinata didn't want to remember.

All of a sudden, his head ached and he could feel his lungs burning. His legs that used to run because he wanted to receive the ball failed to move. Even his hands failed him. Hinata was limp and he was useless.

Then he opened his eyes and he saw that the bus covered in flames. The exact bus where he, Tsukishima, Kageyama, Yamaguchi, and Yachi rode to go back to their home. Hinata's eyes widened, mouth ajar as he tried to comprehend the scene that transpired in front of his eyes, a scene he didn't see coming and never hoped to go through. Hinata was wretched. Until he saw the flames on the burning vehicle stop.

**"Hinata Shouyo, it seems that I have made a mistake."**

A sudden voice boomed. A voice that was neither feminine nor masculine, adult-like or childlike.

Hinata whipped his head to the direction of the voice, only to see a person who had a mask that hid their face. Hinata weakly stood up as he looked at the being with pleading eyes.

"Please save them! All of my friends are inside! You have to do something!" Hinata begged.

"I can't do that. Their death are unavoidable." The being said.

"What about me? I thought I was supposed to die! I was inside that bus!"

"Your death is a mistake. You are not meant to die in the hands of someone."

"I don't understand! Can't you just help them?"

The being stared the orange-haired man, their eyes indescribable.

"A grim reaper's job is to fetch the human's soul, never save them unless..."

Hinata's eyes lit up when he heard that. Out of selflessness and worry, he blurted out, "I'll do anything, I'll even die for my friends! Just save them!"

The grim reaper fixed its mask, its interest were perked but the pain that it felt in its chest seemed unreasonable. The unexplainable emotion of the human it resided in and the grim reaper's ideologies that only its own being could grasp clashed but forget about what the feelings of the body the grim reaper possessed, the supernatural being needed to do its job and that was what it did.

"Let's make a deal, Hinata Shouyo," the grim reaper proposed. "I'll send you back in time just for you to redo your actions. Make sure to prevent this accident from happening and once you succeed, expect to cease from existing."

Hinata bit his lips when he heard that. He could fell tears billowing in his eyes but he held himself back and stayed strong.

"So all I need is to do the opposite of everything I've done? And this accident won't happen... but I'll die?" Hinata asked for clarification, nervousness evident in his voice.

The being nodded and Hinata finally let it drop. He sobbed and his shoulders shook. He wiped his eyes and nodded in utter selfless agreement. The grim reaper could feel anger rising. It must be from its host's emotions flowing again. In complete disregard of the human it resided in, the being snapped its fingers. Time reversed. Hinata helplessly watched as everything he went through the past few days overturned. As it did, there was one person Hinata recalled.

"Can I... tell this to them?" Hinata weakly asked.

"Do you think their frail human minds can take the Truth without them breaking?" the being said before it added, "Making the mistake of telling them is the equivalent of making them insane. Avoid discussing about the Truth at all cost."

"If humans can't take this, then... what am I?"

The supernatural being gazed at Hinata, its eyes showing a glint of interest.

"You are the sacrifice needed for the happiness of others. You are a being who endured the Truth and it is because of the deal you made with me, a grim reaper, which made you tolerant of something that would break any human's mind. You are not a human anymore. You are a being waiting to die. That's all you are."

After that, Hinata blinked but once he opened his eyelids, he found that he was in front of Tsukishima and was in the process of saying something. Hinata bit his tongue and kept silent. He couldn't tell anyone. He would break someone's sanity if he did. He had to suffer alone. He sacrificed himself. He was not a human. He was a being who would die soon. That was all Hinata was.

"Hey, shrimp." Tsukishima called out.

Hinata blinked.

"Are you crying?" Tsukishima asked as he narrowed his eyes. Hinata frantically shook his head.

"I was just... what are we talking about again?" Hinata flashed a grin and it was painful.

"We were talking about your tiny crush with Nekoma's setter." Tsukishima sighed. Hinata chuckled sheepishly as he apologized. The ginger then paused and when Tsukishima saw this, he started wondering when the shorter male would leave.

"I... need help." Hinata murmured.

"What? Did you fail another quiz again?" Tsukishima teased.

Hinata wished that was the case.

"No! I just wanna... well..." Hinata looked away. He could hear the grim reaper's words repeating in his mind. He glanced at Tsukishima and saw the taller male cross his arms and raise an eyebrow so Hinata gulped and took a deep breath.

"Winter is coming!" Hinata exclaimed, he beamed as he did.

He could see Tsukishima's confused stare but that was fine. It was better if the blond didn't know. It was better if his friends didn't know. Hinata would take all of it and save his friends. As the grim reaper said, he is the sacrifice needed for the happiness of others so be it. Hinata chose to act alright as he slowly waited for his oncoming death. Surely, no one would stop it.

Until someone did and desperately, did Hinata hope that he would be saved.

Then he opened his eyes.

Hinata was lying on his bed, sweating hard at the memory of how everything began. Frowning, Hinata covered his mouth to stop himself from shouting and crying. If only Tsukishima could understand why Hinata kept on killing himself but no, the blond had to intervene with Hinata's death and look where it brought all of them. They were in ruins and Hinata failed to save them. All of Hinata's efforts were wasted and it was all because of Tsukishima.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Awww, the backstory of the sun~~ This is what actually happened if only none of them died :))


	11. Inure

Tsukishima stared at the ceiling.

After he, Hinata, and Yamaguchi heard from Yachi's mother that Yachi was asleep and would probably wake up tomorrow or so, the three went home to rest.

But Tsukishima couldn't.

His mind didn't stop repeating what Hinata said at the hospital. The blond didn't know which human the grim reaper resided in and now, he was being bombarded with questions that he probably won't get answers. Tsukishima was left to wonder all alone.

 _"Yamaguchi kept on saying that he was at fault and Hinata definitely knows something, if not, everything. I can't ask them though. They're adamant on keeping silent."_ Tsukishima mused internally.

Soon, Sunday morning came. The blond went out of his house at 9 AM in order to calm his mind. He walked around the neighborhood and as he did, he recalled the first time he died. Tsukishima felt out of place, as if that Saturday was the day where he was supposed to do something. Focusing on that feeling, Tsukishima stopped walking and tried recalling what he actually recollected during his first death. If Tsukishima was remembering it correctly, he remembered that he was supposed to be in a bus, not only with Hinata but with Yamaguchi, Yachi and Kageyama. Then the bus they rode burned and after that, Tsukishima didn't know anymore.

The blond wished that some answer would dawn on him, an explanation that would give him an idea of whose body the supernatural being possessed.

"Hey! Look at this!" a kid shouted as his friends wowed at the toy gun he carried.

"That's cool! Can you shoot it?" another kid asked. The boy who had the toy gun aimed it at the kid who asked.

"Don't shoot! Don't freaking shoot it!" the kid yelled as he was chased by the boy.

Tsukishima blinked and frowned.

"Oi. Don't block the way."

The blond sucked a sharp breath due to shock. He turned around and saw Kageyama, who looked like he was jogging. Tsukishima wondered if Kageyama also knew something but when he observed the setter, the blond guessed that Kageyama didn't know anything about Hinata or the mess they were in. Without a word said, Tsukishima moved back. Kageyama raised an eyebrow before scoffing.

"Hinata told me about Yachi-san." Kageyama said.

"Yeah." Tsukishima shortly replied.

"Yamaguchi's acting weird. He called me and asked me about something."

The blond perked up and looked at the setter with newfound interest then he asked, "What did he ask?"

Kageyama narrowed his eyes and answered with, "He asked me what I think of his dreams."

"What are his dreams about?"

"He told me that he saw you and Hinata dying and that Hinata shot himself."

Tsukishima paused to think. Was it possible that Yamaguchi was the grim reaper? Yamaguchi did say something about being at fault so it wasn't farfetched now that Tsukishima thought about it. With that in mind, Tsukishima stared at Kageyama before murmuring a small "thanks." He then left and headed to Yamaguchi's house.

Kageyama observed the blond. He huffed and shook his head in disapproval before jogging away.

 

* * *

 

"You can't enter! Don't!" Yamaguchi shouted behind the door.

Tsukishima scowled and knocked loudly as he stared exasperatedly at the piece of wood that blocked his way towards the house.

"Yamaguchi, open this door now." Tsukishima tried to remain calm.

"I can't! It's all my fault! I-I-I'm horrible! I'm pathetic!" Yamaguchi cried, covering his ears as he slid down the door. His head ached and he could feel someone staring at him, as if he was a criminal who was in front of people who glared at him. Yamaguchi felt bugs crawling around him despite there being none. Yamaguchi opened his eyes and looked ahead when all of a sudden, he saw a dead body on the floor.

Tsukishima heard Yamaguchi's scream. For the first time in his life, Tsukishima wanted to break someone's door open. He slammed his fist on the door and desperately hoped that Yamaguchi would snap out of whatever delusion he had.

"No! I already apologized! Please stop!" Yamaguchi's screams were heard outside.

"Yamaguchi, snap out of it." Tsukishima spoke loudly.

The freckled male kept shouting as he covered his eyes and ears simultaneously. He peered through his fingers and saw that the dead body was still there. Yamaguchi shook with terror as he heard his own voice. An instigator of murder. Yamaguchi cried and bowed down in hopes of forgiveness.

"Snap out of it!"

Yamaguchi stopped. Was that scream from Tsukishima? Tsukishima screamed? Yamaguchi gulped and looked ahead, only to see nothing. He did a sniffle before weakly standing up. Unsurely turning around, fearing that someone would creep behind him, Yamaguchi anxiously twisted the door knob and pulled it open. Once it did, he found his childhood friend's apprehensive face. Yamaguchi shivered in nervousness before he faked a cough.

"I... that was nothing... I was just a bit... I lacked sleep." Yamaguchi lied through his teeth. Tsukishima stared at him with disbelief.

"Yamaguchi, I know that you've seen me and Hinata die." Tsukishima stated. Yamaguchi froze and he looked away in total guilt.

"I apologize. I shouldn't have told you to do it. I'm so sorry, Tsukki!" Yamaguchi backed away.

"Yamaguchi, calm down. I'm just as scared as you but I know why this is all happening. You have to stop acting like this so we can solve this problem." Tsukishima spoke softly in an attempt to calm Yamaguchi dowm. The freckled male took a deep breath before ranting out, "I'm scared... I don't know what's happening to me, I keep seeing you and Hinata die, especially Hinata! I keep feeling weak and useless. I can't do anything about this and it makes me feel even more pathetic. Then when I see Hinata's dead body on the ground, I get reminded that it's my fault! This wouldn't have happened if I didn't say anything! Hinata wouldn't have to sacrifice himself for us if I didn't say that!"

"Stop." Tsukishima sternly said. Yamaguchi instantly halted.

"Calmly tell me all of what you know and let's solve this after." Tsukishima said. Yamaguchi nodded as he sniffed. The two was about to head to the living room when Yamaguchi's phone rang. The two male paused before the freckled man pulled the phone out of his pocket, still shaken. Yamaguchi saw Hinata's number on it so he became even nervous as he answered the call.

"Uh... yes?" Yamaguchi greeted.

Tsukishima observed his friend and after a few seconds, Yamaguchi's face morphed into confusion and fear before he said, "Okay. I'll be going there." Yamaguchi then hung up.

"Tsukki, I'll explain it to you later." Yamaguchi said.

"Who was that?" Tsukishima queried.

Yamaguchi was uncertain as he said, "Uh... Kageyama." Tsukishima knew that the male was lying but he let it pass. If the blond decided to be forceful then Yamaguchi might become even more shaken and mentally unstable. Tsukishima couldn't have that right now.

"I'll be leaving then. I'll see you later," said Tsukishima as he turned his back on his friend and walked away. He closed the door behind him and once he was out, he glared at the azure sky. He strode away from his friend's house and pushed his hands inside his pockets as he did. Tsukishima was in a rut.

On the other hand, inside a hospital room, Yachi laid in bed with a dextrose injected in her right hand, her left arm and left leg evidently injured. She stirred in her sleep and her closed eyelids started welling up with water. Yachi grunted and grunted until she finally opened her eyes.

 _"I... I almost died... twice..."_ Yachi wailed as she mused internally, her memories as clear as water. She knew she needed to call someone, anyone. Yachi just didn't know who she should call and how she could.

"Hitoka?"

Yachi heard her mother speak. She furrowed her eyebrows before she sobbed.

"Mo...mom... I... almost died." Yachi struggled to speak, her voice hoarse as she wailed along with her mother.

 

* * *

 

Kageyama watched his own body move.

There it was again. The grim reaper was moving his body again and all Kageyama could do was observe from the back. What would the supernatural being do this time?

As Kageyama eyed his body, he caught a glimpse of a familiar blond. No. Kageyama didn't want to see another death again. Not again.

Out of the blue, Kageyama's body ㅡ or rather, the grim reaper ㅡ stopped walking and observed Tsukishima from above a building. The blond kept walking but when he felt someone's presence, he stopped and looked around. He turned around and saw a supernatural being behind him.

"Grim reaper, it's nice seeing you here." Tsukishima still had the will to smirk.

Kageyama didn't stop himself from smirking as well when he saw the usual smug face the blond had.

"Tsukishima Kei. It seems that you're confused." the grim reaper spoke as serenely as ever.

"Yeah, if only you could give some hint about who you are." Tsukishima quipped.

"I wasn't referring to the body I possess. I was referring to the memory that Hinata and Yamaguchi knows of, one that you don't have a single clue about."

The blond narrowed his eyes after.

"Do you want to know? I can help?"

Kageyama wanted to scream at Tsukishima to not accept the offer. The grim reaper was probably planning something that Kageyama knew nothing of that was why Kageyama felt his body shake with anger and he knew that the grim reaper felt it too, it just dismissed the black-haired male's emotions and focused on it's own goals and plans.

The blond hesitated as he gazed at the being's eyes. Since he died again and again, Tsukishima was certain that nothing would terrify him angrier so after a few seconds of reconsideration, Tsukishima nodded unsurely,

The mask hid the smirk the grim reaper had as it ignored the anger erupting inside the body it possessed. The supernatural being's plan was about to be finished. Just a bit more and it would get the satisfying ending the superior beings planned for. All the grim reaper needed was a few more days before he could deliver the good news to the superior one.

"Then, stand still and face your sins. Tsukishima Kei." the grim reaper muttered, it's voice laced with satisfaction as it showed the Truth and nothing more than the horrible truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll be honest with you.... this story is possibly the cringiest thing I've written and I don't even regret it :) Lololol ~(ㅇㅅㅇ)~


	12. Cynosure

If anyone asked why Tsukishima liked a certain orange-haired man, then Tsukishima wouldn't be able to answer quickly. But after a few moment of thinking, maybe Tsukishima could give a proper explanation as to why he suddenly liked the ginger. Maybe it was Hinata's eyes. The warm orbs that gazed up at him melted the blond male's coldness and turned him into a puddle of emotion that Tsukishima didn't know he was capable of feeling. Or maybe it was the sunny attitude that Hinata showed. A colorful and bright personality that used to irritate the blond but only became endearing as the days passed by.

Whatever it was that attracted him to the shorter male, Tsukishima didn't want to know. Personally, the mystery in how and why he ended up liking the ginger made him become fond of Hinata even more, made his feelings grow stronger and made him more sappy everytime Tsukishima saw the orange-haired male. But Tsukishima, as weird as it seemed, didn't actually mind. It was an odd feeling that he didn't want to appreciate at first but it became pleasing the more he felt it so he just allowed himself to get swallowed by his own emotion.

And then a weird twist of fate happened and somehow, Hinata and Tsukishima were left alone to clean the gym. It wasn't awkward thankfully but it did irk the blond.

Then another twist of fate happened.

"I like you." Hinata whispered as he placed his palm beside his mouth.

How adorable.

Tsukishima held back his smile as he said, "I don't like you."

And somehow, the two decided to go out. All was good and everything worked alright.

**"But it wasn't meant to be alright."**

Tsukishima glanced to his left. It was a Saturday evening and he was on his way home with his friends after they went out to an amusement park.

Then the bus stopped. The bus driver got shot. A man entered.

"Don't move! I swear, I'll shoot if someone moves!" shouted the man as he pointed the gun.

Tsukishima could still hear the scream of a child and the gunshot that was pointed at the child's mother. Tsukishima was seated in front, with Hinata, Yamaguchi, Yachi, and Kageyama and because of this, he could see how terrified his friends were, how much three of his friends shook with fear, how much Tsukishima tried to act tough as he saw the gun aimed at him.

"Hey blondie! Stand up!"

Yachi and Tsukishima glanced shortly before Tsukishima chose to stand up. He could hear Hinata whispering something to him. Something that sounded like "what are you doing" or possibly something similar to that.

"Here. Hold this gun. I bought another one." the man gave Tsukishima another weapon. The blond male felt his cold sweat as he grabbed the gun and instantly, the cold metal greeted him.

"Listen kid! All you have to do is choose!" the man then aimed at the child. "Let me shoot the kid or," he then pointed at Hinata with his other hand, "you shoot your ginger friend over there."

Yamaguchi and Yachi froze while Kageyama glared at Tsukishima.

"It's simple, isn't it? You have five seconds to decide. One..."

Hinata gazed at Tsukishima, pleading. Hinata then glanced at the kid, which made Tsukishima look at the child as well. They both saw the tears in the child's eyes.

"Two."

Yamaguchi noticed the child's gaze. He clenched his hands as Yachi said, "Yamaguchi, do something! Please! Help Hinata!"

Kageyama growled. He took a step forward while angrily saying, "Don't shoot! Don't you fucking shoot that thing at the dumbass! i swear to god! You'll fucking die if you do!"

"Three... Shoot him! Shoot him now or I'll shoot her!"

Hinata frowned, his eyes wet as he started breathing unevenly. Tsukishima bit his lower lip as his hold on the gun tightened.

Yamaguchi frowned before shouting, "Shoot Hinata! We can't let the kid die!"

"Four! If you don't shoot, an innocent kid's gonna die!"

Tsukishima eyed the child. He saw them crying as they held their dead mother's hand. The blond male slowly raised the gun and pointed it towards Hinata.

"Tsukishima, you fucking bastard!" Kageyama fumed in anger. Yamaguchi insisted that Tsukishima shoot Hinata while Yachi shook and covered her ears in utter terror. Hinata was scared but he could see that the child was even more scared.

Hinata eyed Tsukishima with gloom as he said, "...it's okay. I'll be fine. Pull the trigger and save the kid."

"Five! That kid's gonna ㅡ"

The man's voice got cut off as the sound of a gun silenced the whole bus. He stared at the orange-haired man on the ground before he looked at the blond man.

Tsukishima dropped the gun as he fell down. He eyed the ginger's body as he started inhaling deeply before his tears fell. Kageyama didn't move and merely looked at his partner's body with disbelief. Yamaguchi shook as he looked away. Yachi kept her hands on her mouth to prevent herself from wailing too loud. Hinata kept unmoved until his hand shifted. Tsukishima's eyes widened before he loomed near the shorter male. He pulled the ginger in his arms as Hinata tried to breath properly.

"Take a deep breath and don't ㅡ"

"My... my stomach hurts..." Hinata coughed.

Kageyama gritted his teeth before launching himself towards the shooter. Yamaguchi sucked a sharp breath before rushing to help Kageyama. Yachi saw the shooter's bag so she grabbed it and checked what was inside.

"Don't talk. Just don't." Tsukishima hissed.

Hinata inhaled but it was as if he was a fish out of the water. "Sorry... I shouldn't have...confessed if... I would die soon." Hinata breathed in between his words.

"I said, stop talking!" Tsukishima's voice rose as he placed pressure on the area he shot Hinata at. He calmed himself and prevented himself from crying while Hinata sobbed and desperately inhaled air to keep living.

"He has a bomb!" Yachi shouted as Kageyama and Yamaguchi loosened their hold on the shooter, causing him to shoot Kageyama in the head. Yamaguchi cussed under his breath as the shooter aimed the gun at him. The freckled male got hit in the leg and immediately slid down. The shooter shouted in frustration as he pulled the switch out. Yachi saw the man press the button and once she looked down, she spotted the bomb counting down. Yachi dropped it and went to the window. She tried to open it so she could throw the bomb out but it was futile, it wouldn't open no matter how much she pulled. Yachi sobbed and slammed the window before she rested her forehead on it. She guessed that this was how she would die.

Yamaguchi weakly eyed Tsukishima. Hinata felt calm as his vision started darkening. Hinata felt his eyelids become heavy so he closed it. Tsukishima's hold on the shorter male tightened as he brought the ginger close to him.

Then a sob was heard.

Yamaguchi gaped at his childhood friend while Yachi solemnly gazed at Tsukishima as the bomb counted down to one.

And then...

**"I'll do anything, I'll even die for my friends! Just save them!"**

The grim reaper appeared and revived Hinata, saying that Tsukishima made a mistake and killed someone who shouldn't have died in the first place and because of this, Hinata sacrificed himself for the rest of his friends.

Tsukishima witnessed the whole conversation Hinata had with the grim reaper. The blond male realized what Yamaguchi meant and why Hinata wanted to die once he watched the ginger weep before Hinata went back to the day he was supposed to confess to Tsukishima. He watched Hinata keep his feelings bottled up and the mutual admiration that should've happened never did, leaving a painful sensation on the ginger's whole being. All that was supposed to happen never happened and all that was left was Hinata's death. A tragic story that should've ended the suffering of a man with a sunny smile, only to be stopped when Tsukishima saved him.

Tsukishima didn't know that saving someone from death could bring more pain to the person he wanted to live.

What Yamaguchi told him before rang in Tsukishima's mind.

**"You didn't save Hinata. You saved yourself and your own happiness. You'll just keep torturing Hinata with what you're doing. How selfish. How disgusting."**

Yamaguchi was right. Tsukishima did it for himself. No one else benefited from his actions but only him. Knowing this, Tsukishima closed his eyes. It took three seconds until he opened his eyes again. Once he did, he was back in the place where he was supposed to be. In front of the grim reaper, under the winter sun on a Sunday morning.

The grim reaper lifted its mask to show its lips that formed into a smirk.

"How does it feel being the cause of your loved one's pain?"

Tsukishima couldn't say anything. He didn't cry but he didn't speak as well. He pathetically stood still, eyes empty and body weightless.

"Everything Hinata worked for... I wasted it all." Tsukishima spoke softly. His state was fragile, easily broken down like a piece of paper turning into ashes because of fire.

"Isn't it unfair?" the grim reaper's voice suddenly sounded familiar. **"Why should Hinata suffer for your self-satisfaction? Tsukishima, you're a fucking jerk. Why don't you just die? Let the grim reaper think of a way to kill you."**

Tsukishima knew that voice. He stared at the being in front of him but his vision spun as he felt gravity pull him down. Before he knew it, Tsukishima was on the snow-cushioned floor and the masked being looked down on him with a judging grin.

"Even the owner of this body despises what you've done." the being spoke indifferently before it started walking away. The blond male couldn't move and was glued to the floor.

Tsukishima would've been pissed if only he didn't know the Truth. All of this happened because of him. No one was to be blamed but him. Being aware of that, Tsukishima kept unmoved on the ground as he closed his eyes, letting himself suffer im silence and anguish.

 

* * *

 

Yamaguchi walked home as he recalled what Hinata told him earlier.

 _"Hinata said that grim reapers were real and he made a deal with one. Even Tsukki made a deal with a grim reaper and that deal Tsukki made was to find which human the grim reaper possessed in order to spare Hinata's life. If that's the case, then Hinata and I should help Tsukki. I need to make Hinata believe that Tsukki knows and wouldn't get insane because of knowing the Truㅡ"_ Yamaguchi's thoughts were cut off when his phone rang again. He brought it out and to his surprise, Yachi's name was on the call screen. Yamaguchi furrowed his eyebrows as he answered the call.

"Yamaguchi-kun... I need to tell you something. Can you come here as soon as possible?"

Yamaguchi paused for a second before saying yes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you think?? This story is nearing the end, did you enjoy it???


	13. Denouement

Yamaguchi knocked on the door. He waited for a while until he heard someone inside the room telling him to come in. With this, the freckled male entered and spotted Yachi covering her eyes with her hands.

"Yachi-san... are you ok?" Yamaguchi questioned.

"Yamaguchi-kun, I-I-I'm... I'm sorry for being useless! I remember it all now!" Yachi sobbed and shook. Yamaguchi gaped before he figured out what to do.

 

* * *

 

At their school's rooftop, Hinata and Tsukishima were in front of each other while the snow softly dropped.

"Why did you call me?" Hinata questioned, sitting down the ground while staring up at the blond.

Tsukishima smirked for a bit until his lips curved into a frown. He said, "Don't say anything and just hear me out." Hinata raised an eyebrow but nodded nevertheless. This caused Tsukishima to show a smile for a second before it disappeared and a frowned replaced it.

"I like you."

Hinata's eyes widened.

"And, I'm sorry." Tsukishima spoke softly, averting the gaze that the ginger sent him. Taking a deep breath, the blond blurted out, "This all happened because of me and I'm taking liability for what I did. Hinata..." he clenched his hand, "Let's forget about all of this and move on... I won't stop you anymore."

Hearing this, Hinata smiled fondly as he stood up. Finally, he could finish the deal he made with a supernatural being.

"Do you know why I know all of this?" Hinata asked.

Tsukishima shook his head.

"The grim reaper likes talking to me! Heh, I don't know why though!" Hinata rubbed the back of his neck while chuckling sheepishly. He loomed near the railings and gazed at the sky ahead of him. It seemed to be welcoming him.

"The grim reaper... it kept appearing just to tell me what you were doing and all the stupid things you've made to save me, even when you made a deal with it but I know it won't work... because our deal is still up and it's still waiting for me to die." Hinata spoke, his voice cracking every now and then. Tsukishima eyed the shorter male as Hinata climbed over the fence and once he was outside of the railings, Tsukishima's frown deepened but he kept still.

"Walk away and don't look back." Hinata muttered as he turned to the blond male. Tsukishima nodded silently as he turned his back on Hinata, who showed a sunny grin once he saw the blond turn around and slowly walk away. Hinata could see the hesitation in Tsukishima's steps.

"Keep walking. We can end this now so just keep walking and... don't turn around," Hinata's hands shook as his lips quivered, causing him to slap himself before adding, "Hey, Tsukishima... it was nice meeting you. Take care of yourself, okay?"

Tsukishima stopped. He clenched his jaws before whipping his head around. He glared at the ginger and stomped towards him.

Hinata scowled and uttered, "Tsukishima, I said ㅡ"

"Stop saying anything and get over here." Tsukishima snapped as he grabbed the metal railings and yanked Hinata's wrist. The ginger blinked and narrowed his eyes as he tried to push Tsukishima away.

"Please, don't do this. You're torturing me," the ginger spoke weakly as he forced himself not to cry.

"I'll find a way so don't jump. I'll figure out which body the grim reaper possessed as long as you say you'll try and live." Tsukishima could feel his emotions spill, many of the words he used were words he never expected to say. It sickened him to speak things like that but if it was what it would take to make Hinata believe then it was acceptable to say every phrases he didn't want to use, even overused sentences only said by actors in the screen.

"No. Just go." Hinata cried.

"I won't."  Tsukishima muttered. Hinata couldn't hold back anymore and pulled the blond male. Tears streaked down his cheeks as he quietly deepened the kiss. Tsukishima stiffened before putting a hand behind the ginger's head, pulling the shorter male closer. Hinata weakly allowed the blond to dominate over him as he sobbed while Tsukishima's hand slid down from the ginger's hair and towards Hinata's hand. Soon, the two broke up and separated, heavily breathing.

Hinata then hiccupped before blurting out, "Let me go."

Tsukishima eyed the shorter male as he gradually and unsurely released the ginger from his grasp. He backed away and turned around as his shoulders shook, preventing himself from showing his face to Hinata while crying. Hinata's knee weakened as the blond walked away, kneeling down as he wailed desperately and loudly. Tsukishima could hear how evident the ginger's anguish was in his cries but he kept walking towards the door. The blond gripped the door knob firmly before twisting it and pushing it open. Without taking another glance, Tsukishima sucked a sharp breath through his teeth before closing the door behind him. Once he did, the blond leaned on the door and tried to stand still as he held his face and sobbed quietly.

One, two, three, four, five... Tsukishima sniffed and pushed himself away from the door. He faced the metal door behind him and hastily pulled it open, only to see no one in the rooftop. Seeing this, Tsukishima slammed his hand on the door and kicked it with frustration while letting his emotions take over him. Then sliding down the floor, Tsukishima leaned on the doorway and rested his arms on his knees before finally hugging his knees close to his chest.

Maybe he was never meant to end up with the orange-haired male in the first place. Or maybe this was all planned from the very first second he, Hinata, and the others were given life and birthed. If this was fate then Tsukishima knew that he couldn't do anything but accept it because no matter how much he protested against it, nothing would happen. So with his sadness and pain eating him whole, the blond kept crying, with the empty rooftop, the cold blue sky, and the descending snowflakes all behind him.

 


	14. Epiphany

Kageyama walked towards his partner's lifeless body. He could see blood trickle down Hinata's ear and mouth as the ginger's arms were unnatural splayed. He could notice that the male's head was fractured as well.

"Dumbass." Kageyama murmured as he removed the mask that hid his face. Once he lifted the cover off, his tear-stained cheeks became obvious. Kageyama then glanced at the window and saw his own self frowning at him.

Then his reflection opened its mouth.

 **"Just a bit more and your pain would end,"** said his reflection.

Kageyama growled as he uttered, "I don't care. If Hinata's dead and the others are going insane, do you think I could still live properly?"

His reflection frowned. Kageyama scowled, mad at how much he had to go through because of the grim reaper.

"I was forced to watch Hinata and Tsukishima die again and again while I couldn't even do anything for Yamaguchi or even, Yachi! Then now that Tsukishima gave up on Hinata, you'd tell me that I would soon stop feeling pain?! How could I stop suffering if you stole everyone who's important to me?!" Kageyama shouted.

The supernatural being didn't say anything. It could feel Kageyama's anguish, causing it to feel what the black-haired male was feeling as well. The grim reaper furrowed its eyebrow as a single tear slid down its cheek. Kageyama's reflection stopped taking a life on its own and all that was left was Kageyama's pained image.

 

* * *

 

Tsukishima didn't force himself to see what happened to an orange-haired man and just exited the school without checking Hinata. His phone that was in his pocket vibrated, so he pulled it out and answered the call.

"Hey, Tsukki. Where are you?" Yamaguchi greeted, seemingly in a hurry.

"I'm... at home." Tsukishima lied. He then heard Yamaguchi cussing under his breath. The blond ignored his friend cursing and kept trotting towards his way home. He paused for a bit and looked back.

"Tsukki, I know this is a sudden but Yachi-san told me something. You might think that I don't know about anything but I do! I know about the deal you made with the grim reaper!"

Tsukishima frowned when he heard that. "Who told you?" asked the blond.

"Hinata did."

Of course. Tsukishima should've expected that. He sighed and rubbed his temples and once he lowered his hands, he spotted Kageyama, who was on his way to leave the campus ground.

"Tsukki, Yachi-san told me that she remembers what happened in the bus. Do you remember that day where a man held us as hostage? Yachi-san said that after the bomb exploded, she saw Hinata and Kageyama disappear all of a sudden." Yamaguchi hurriedly informed.

"Disappear? Hinata and Kageyama?" Tsukishima said as he scanned Kageyama's appearance. Wearing a black hoodie and carrying a white mask, Kageyama stood in front of the blond male with stun. Tsukishima's hold on his phone tightened as he softly muttered, "I'll talk to you later, Yamaguchi."

Tsukishima hung up after.

Kageyama clenched his jaws and glared at the blond.

Sneering, Tsukishima said, "Do you think you have any right to glare right now? You, who did nothing and watch?"

"This wouldn't have happened if you didn't shoot Hinata." Kageyama countered, causing Tsukishima to click his tongue.

"What? Got something else to say? Spit it out. I can't wait to hear a killer's words." Kageyama spat out with disgust. The blond stood still. He felt his resolve crumble as Kageyama glowered at him coldly and apathetically. "I... Kageyama, you..." Tsukishima struggled to say the right words out of his mouth. He could see the hate in the black-haired male's eyes and it froze him.

"I don't want to argue right now." A pathetic choice of words that Tsukishima was forced to say out loud. Kageyama didn't stop staring daggers at the blond and just kept quiet. The two glared at one another until Tsukishima finally broke off and scoffed.

"Are you the human the grim reaper resides in?" he asked.

"I am." Kageyama answered immediately.

"Now that I found you, what will happen?"

Kageyama froze. He gazed at the mask in his hand and gripped it firmly. If he could revive Hinata, then he'd risk letting the grim reaper possess him again. He looked at Tsukishima and uncertainty filled him as he placed the mask on his face. Tsukishima watched with wariness, waiting for Kageyama to do whatever he had in mind. When the black-haired male finally wore the mask, Tsukishima gulped and ignored the feeling of dread that popped out of nowhere.

"It seems that you've found out who I possess. Very well, I will spare Hinata Shouyo's life." the supernatural being said.

All of a sudden, Tsukishima's head ached as he felt a pain in his chest. He looked ahead of him to see if Kageyama felt the same thing and to his surprise, Kageyama was kneeling on the ground as he groaned and grabbed his head. Whatever it was that Kageyama felt, Tsukishima was feeling it as well. Then all of the memories the two men experienced filled their mind as they succumbed to the pain and fell down the snow-covered ground.

And when Tsukishima opened his eyelids, he found himself inside a random store, with Hinata and Yamaguchi beside him and Kageyama and Yachi in front of him. All five of them had a puzzled and shocked expression as Kageyama finally shot up from his seat.

"Are we back? Are we..." Kageyama's throat tightened as he forced out his words. "Are we finally safe?" he asked.

Hinata looked down on his palm, Yamaguchi hyperventilated, Yachi started tearing up, while Tsukishima removed his glasses and pulled Hinata in his arms. The two male froze as Yamaguchi, Yachi, and Kageyama started breaking down.

"I...argh! I'm sorry!" Hinata cried out as he tightly hugged Tsukishima back.

"Hinata! I'm sorry! I shouldn't have told Tsukki to shoot you!" Yamaguchi screamed his apology. Hinata pulled Yamaguchi to thr hug, making the three huddle up as they cried.

"What? Come on!" Hinata exclaimed as he motioned Yachi and Kageyama to come close. Yachi pushed Kageyama as she sniffed but she and the black-haired setter got pulled by Hinata and Yamaguchi. When all of them were huddled up and had their arms around each other, creating a small circle together, they started to cry and laugh at the same time, too glad about finally escaping the grim reaper's grasp.

 

* * *

 

Hinata beamed as he waited for his friends.

"Oi, dumbass. Here." Kageyama threw the water bottle at Hinata, who caught it with his hands. Yamaguchi popped out from behind Kageyama as he showed the food he bought for the group. Hinata cheered as his two friends approached him.

"Where's Tsukki?" Yamaguchi asked, putting the bag of food down before sitting beside the ginger.

"He went to buy something." Hinata said as he opened the bottle that Kageyama gave him. The three men saw Yachi looming closer with another bag of food in hand. They greeted the blonde female and waited for Tsukishima together. They conversed with a light-hearted atmosphere until the blond man finally returned. Tsukishima observed his friends. Kageyama looked sharply at him but it wasn't because of ill feelings, more of an irritated stare because Tsukishima made them wait. Yachi smiled at him before she returned her attention at the bag of food she made. Yamaguchi waved at his childhood friend while talking to Hinata, who gazed at the blond man fondly.

This was how it should be.

Soon, the group started making their way to their destination. Since it was Kageyama's birthday, the group decided to go visit an amusement park. Yamaguchi and Yachi were tasked for food, Hinata told the group that he'd take pictures, while Tsukishima and Kageyama were forced to pay for the group's entrance fee after the two lost in a game of rock paper scissors.

Riding the bus, Tsukishima and Hinata were supposed to sit together until Kageyama shoved  Hinata away and told him to sit next to Yamaguchi, who laughed heartily at what the setter did. Hinata hissed at Kageyama before stomping to Yamaguchi's side. Kageyama huffed as he plopped down beside Tsukishima, who sent him a nonchalant look.

"What are you doing? Are you my boyfriend? Don't sit beside me." Tsukishima blurted out.

"Fuck off. Like hell, I'd let Hinata sit next to you." Kageyama grunted his words out. The two glared at each other until a snack was thrown at them. Kageyama clicked his tongue and looked behind him, only to see Yachi, Yamaguchi and Hinata snickering at him. The black-haired male ignored them and leaned on his seat.

The bus started to drive and as it did, Tsukishima could feel his eyelids becoming heavy. He closed his eyes but someone tapped his shoulder so he looked to his left and saw Kageyama staring at him.

"What?" Tsukishima asked.

Out of the blue, Kageyama smirked. Tsukishima's eyes widened as a result.

"The owner of this body likes the present you gave him." Kageyama ㅡ no, the grim reaper said with a smug grin plastered on his face.

"Why? Shouldn't you be gone?" Tsukishima responded, looking around to see if someone could see him but the seat to the other side was empty and no one seemed to be in the bus but him and his friends. Tsukishima clenched his hands and glowered at the person beside him.

"Let's talk, Tsukishima Kei. It's been a while since I talked to a human without ill intents after all." the being spoke softly, before smiling gently. Tsukishima was unnerved because not only did the grim reaper say something odd, he saw Kageyama's face smiling gently. Nodding unsurely, Tsukishima kept wary.

The grim reaper nodded, letting its smile disappear. Then, it leaned on the seat and crossed its legs as it looked in front of him with a calm expression.

"Do you know the qualifications of being a grim reaper?" it asked with a kind voice. Tsukishima said no and kept calm to avoid worrying others. The grim reaper then smiled at him as it pushed its hair back.

"To be one, you must know and endure the Truth. You must go through death and be revived to understand what life means. Then finally, you must die one last time so you can be reborn as a grim reaper."

Tsukishima frozed. He analyzed what the supernatural being said and to his horror, he realized that he experienced all of it, as well as Hinata, Yamaguchi, Kageyama and Yachi. The blond man's eyes widened as he shot up from his seat. He glanced at the seat behind him and saw Hinata and Yamaguchi sleeping, as well as Yachi, who sat on the other chair, fainted. The blond could hear a sigh so he turned to Kageyama's body.

"All of this... you planned all of it." Tsukishima hissed.

Smirking with self-satisfaction, the being said, "Do you think this happened out of a whim? Think twice. All of this is not a coincidence. This started for one reason and it will end for that sole purpose... To turn the five of you into superior beings. A grim reaper."

Tsukishima sat back down as he snorted in disbelief.

"You really won't let us be happy, won't you?" Tsukishima pushed his hair back and leaned on the window as he smirked emptily.

"So you'll kill us and turn us into someone like you? Us who are humans?" he uttered.

"Don't be ridiculous. The five of you aren't human. A normal human wouldn't be able to stay sane after finding out the truth. Anyone who has the will to endure the Truth will be turned into a superior being." the being spoke with a hint of mischief.

Tsukishima bit his lower lip. He forced himself to stand up and glance at his friends and Hinata then to the grim reaper who had Kageyama's body.

"Is this what we're born for? If that's the case, fine."

Kageyama frowned before he closed his eyes, completely accepting his end.

Tsukishima eyed the black-haired male drop to the ground as the bus driver looked behind to see if something was wrong, only to see a blond male standing with a solemn expression as his friends refused to wake up.

"Sir, I think you should sit down!" the driver exclaimed.

Tsukishima side-eyed the driver as he asked, "Why? Is something about to happen?"

The driver gulped and nervously said, "The brakes... it won't work, sir."

Tsukishima chuckled darkly. Of course. No normal humans could withstand the truth about human life. No normal human would experience dying twice or more. Tsukishima was a fool to believe that he escaped the grim reaper's hold. Epiphany. That was how Tsukishima would summarize this moment. A sudden revelation that was fated to appear from the very beginning. How could Tsukishima be oblivious to everything? Why did he have to experience an epiphany before he could figure out how it would end?

Sitting down the chair, the blond male exhaustively sighed and as the bus driver without a stop, Tsukishima waited for his and his friends' death.

Then a loud honk was heard but before the blond could look ahead to see what it was, his vision darkened. The last thing he felt was a burning sensation on his skin before he lost all if his consciousness.

 

* * *

 

_"...bus and a truck... the driver and five students... burned beyond recognition... investigating to find out who died in the accident..."_

Matsukawa bit on the lollipop in his mouth as he watched the television with three of his friends.

"That's tragic. I feel bad for them." Oikawa whined as he leaned on his chair.

Grinning with a hint of trouble, Matsukawa said, "At least they'll turn into some superior being."

Hanamaki paused, Iwaizumi stared at him weirdly while Oikawa snorted. Matsukawa smirked and ignored his friends before glancing at the mirror in front of him. His reflection, that only he could see, glared at him. Matsukawa sighed in relief, content with turning five humans into beings like him, before looking at Iwaizumi, Oikawa and Hanamaki.

 _"Let's see if Iwaizumi could do the same thing Tsukishima Kei did."_ Matsukawa mused internally before finally breaking the lollipop in his mouth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So.... this is the end. I admit, I had a hard time with this. When I first wrote this, I wrote out of pure enjoyment, like, I was smiling while I typed it in my laptop because it seemed twisted and I didn't even give consideration for the plot. That's why, I liked writing this but I figured out that I have a lot to learn with this fanfiction.
> 
> Enough about me, let's talk about the plot. This is what I wanted to happen from the very start. I didn't intend for them to be happy so I'm very sorry to disappoint you. The reason why the grim reaper's mission for Tsukki is so easy was so the last event could happen; the final death and the eventual transformation from human to a supernatural being.
> 
> I think all of you understood the ending and I don't need to explain it further. The whole summary for this is; a grim reaper makes Tsukki, Hinata, Kageyama, Yamaguchi and Yachi suffer before making them not human. Now that I'm reading this, I realize how ridiculous premise is and I'm laughing rn. Literally.
> 
> And in the last scene, you can see that Mattsun would experience the same thing Kageyama experienced but with Iwa, Oikawa and Makki.... if you're expecting anything, which I'm sure you're not after you've seen the ending, please stop. I won't write another fantasy series but maybe I'll write about crime since I quite like murderers and their mind games with the cops.
> 
> Thanks for the support. I hope I ended things in a good note and if I disappoint you with my ending, I deeply apologize, but I won't change my ending for anyone else's satisfaction. Sorry ;)
> 
> Thus! This story ends! See you some other time! And thank you once again!!!


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